A VISITOR

Grandson K is here from Sweden. He is a very nice kid. He is extremely polite, I can't believe how polite he is. He has grown. We see him once a year . He speaks Swedish fluently and does well in school even so he has Aspberger Autism. A pleasure to see him. His dad is delighted.
A change from the tragedies of the last 2 months. Some sunshine.

Read this in WOWOW by Kay Rayan s me nuts. Here’s one of her poems that she wrote about her mother:

THINGS SHOULDN’T BE SO HARD

A life should leave
deep tracks:
ruts where she
went out and back
to get the mail
or move the hose
around the yard;
where she used to
stand before the sink,
a worn-out place;
beneath her hand,
the china knobs
rubbed down to
white pastilles;
the switch she
used to feel for
in the dark
almost erased.
Her things should
keep her marks.
The passage
of a life should show;
it should not abrade.
And when life stops,
a certain space
––however small––
should be left scarred
by the grand and
damaging parade.
Things shouldn’t
be so hard.

Turn it around

Ok it is a good thing that I am blogging for when I look back on some of these blogs
I am thinking that I have been in the negative pitty pot for far too long.
I have not allowed myself to do that in the past.
What is going on here?
The home situation is what it is.
Accept it and go on with it.
Sounds simple, does it not?
I always thought so, I am very flexible, so what is wrong here, old girl?
So I am a bit depressed, who is n't?
I got to change my attitude.

Another Loss

I so wish to be able to write some uplifting , great news and saying that all is well in the world.
All well in my world. We know about the rest of the world.
Yesterday another BLACK DAY . Perhaps a day of liberation to heart ache for a mother.
Yesterday a friend found daughter-in-law 's mother had passed on.
Her only child died 2 months ago, I think to the day.
I believe her heart ached just too much.
She had a heart attack.
We are still reeling from the shock of A leaving us at age 32 and now her mom.
I feel like a black cloud is following us.
It is hard to be upbeat and positive when all this is happening in such a short time.
You do not have the time to get over the first shock.

Then I saw that Paradise Ca. was in trouble with fires and a good friend of my
husband's lives there , so far no telephone conversations received.

Outside the birds are chirping , the sun is shining and we are in for another hot but lovely day.
I got to get a grip and turn the tide of tears.

BAD DAY

I got up with the feeling a black cloud is following me everywhere.
So then the tears come for no reason.
I would say it is PMS but I am 76 now.
Old B is sleeping a lot right at the table, goes to bed for 5 minutes comes back and
sleeps some more at the table in a very uncomfortable position.
Forgets when he ate and when he drank so he drinks all day long and we all
drink something different so he takes from us all whatever the mood strikes him
or the color of the bottle or can.
He eats sometimes one meal after another because he tells me he is hungry,
i THINK he does not know what it means.
So he end up sneaking it to the dogs who are later ill and throwing up all
over the place. He loves to give them milk.
He is getting on my nerves this week.
Messed up one of my necklaces till it broke.
I knew I should have put it away right away but so many other chores were calling so in
no time it was broken.
Bad hair day, they say , no bad day PERIOD. today.

No celebration this week end

We opted for peace and quiet this week end.
I worked even on the 4th.
Most retail keeps on going.
I did not mind but forgot to wear red white and blue.
Oh well, brown for the day did fine too.

No fan of G W B I do not feel like I should wish him a
happy birthday either.
WOWOW site had bunch of wishes.
I was furious as they put in Coultier too as a visiting
friend.
I guess we have to have freedom of speech.

Its been a bummer at home , papers on the adoption of O and
young B mostly in a silent mood.
He keeps too much inside.

I went to the cemetary and brought a cement planter with flowers
in.
Son wants to buy a stone but they are expensive.

One turns around and one needs money for this or that
it is unending.

For the first time I am not longing to go to work in the morning.
I am thinking more and more about retiring but still need the
money from the store to make up for expenses and c c

It was an expensive month.
New fridge, new computer desk and chair.
My best buy was a rug at Lowes
it was a sample.
They were selling all the samples for 20.00
they were flying out of the store.
I got a nice one which looks like a handmade oriental
one does not notice the numbers woven into the rug for the sample mark.
Furniture over it.
It looks like a million bucks!!!!!

Son starting to paint my hallway.
It is his week end project.
Meanwhile we are getting ready for a yard sale this week end.
I do not like them but have too muich stuff which has to find a better home.
I have given away tons already at Goodwill but some are good antique
glass ware.

Hoping for a better week ahead

COOLING DOWN

Last few days have cooled down a lot so I am welcoming the breeze and the house is
lovely and cool. I am sure this too shall not last after all we just entered July.

Have an apple tree which for the first time has some fruit. Should say HAD,
Bob went and picked the small green apples. Just like he did with the cherries.
I am wondering how long the tomatoes will last.
At least I can do fried green tomatoes but not when they are the size of a dime
and feel like a rock.

Flowers have surprised me I think the organic feeding of worm poop is good for them.
I am impressed. Hostas are blooming more too.

Had a great day yesterday with Sabrina, she had to shop for a bird in the office,
Pet shopping is fun. It comes with the choices, the connections, the hope for the
future joy . She settled on 2 nice finches. We think they are husband and wife but then
again they could be a gay couple. The huge cage in Sabrina's office will add to the
ambiance of the clients being adjusted by the chiropractor.

Son had a few bad days with decisions to his step son and the wishes and hindsight that
he should have adopted the child he raised for the last 7 1/2 years.
We all can do so very well with hindsight but at the moment there are things
which come into play to make these decisions not possible, money for one thing.

Money talks, big money screams at ye, lawyers are costly and not always truly working for you.
This is the situation he has to deal with.
A loss of a friend, spouse, and now a child.
Life is not always easy but at least we can hope for a better tomorrow.
I am so wishing that his tomorrows will become filled with sunshine and leave the dark clouds behind. He had enough of these to last the rest of his life.

We are having sales upon sales in the shop but then we went to Coldwater Creek and they had better sales than us. WOW. It is a buyers market.
Read that Starbucks will close a bunch of stores and downsize in a big way.
I cant afford to retire just yet but there is a possibility that closing trend may be
coming for a lot more of the chain stores.
Hope we can hang in there.