Spring 2012

I looked out of my kitchen window and saw the tree across the street in full bloom so I opened the window for the first time this year. OK OK I do not have a screen on that one, I love the feel of open view and tolerate what flies in.

Cat with attitude

Rhonda gave me this planter cat years ago and I just love it.
She, I assume it is a she, she has a big belly, is pissed at me
for I have yet to fill the belly so she made a face.
I thought putting her next to the tulip would help but it did n't.

Bijou surprise

When I was at the party I had been gone 2 days from home , staying in Brevard with Brie and co. is fun too but I had gone on her bed on Friday at 1 PM and said "I will take a little nap". She said "go for it,Mom" I woke up at 5 pm.....

back to the party I visited with 3 large dogs, one is half wolf and half German shepherd, she has blonde hair is large and sweet. I think the others were a 47 varieties kind. They all came to say hello, all had the roaming power of this large piece of land. How swell. I kept petting dogs as I missed Bijou so.

Rhonda had been to my house to pick up a present Bob had for Nick so she decided to bring Bijou. She arrived after us and one of the kids said:"There is your dog".
I said something like "No he is home and I miss him". I saw that white fur ball in the distance and ...so help me...I thought I would start to cry my eyes out...
the dogs all greeted him and sniffed some derrieres and he just ignored them.
Not the usual, he barks at a falling leaf. I started to call his name, he looked up, took off like a jet and came running to me. He licked me clean, my face covered with his kisses. My heart jumped a faster beat, I did not have to rush home now.
I am such a nut, I can't begin to explain how I feel about this bit of fur , is that natural? I feel like we are just one.
The peace and quiet with the others was finished once I was seated and he took the throne on my lap position then the other dogs were not allowed near.
He growled at the wolf/dog and all the others.
They took the hint and left me and him alone.
Rhonda, you are a peach to think that we needed each other in the woods of Old Fort.
Thank you very much.

Party time

Invited at Grandsons place for his 26th birthday and house warming.
He and a dozen or so friends, all like minded, built an adobe hut/house.
Most of them still in college are going to be able to use it as they need it.
He has another year nearby and it saves on rent from his student loan.
He invested the rent money in materials, it is quite large with windows, doors ,propane stove etc...
Nick is getting close to being an osteopath but will go on for another 4 years to have a specialty. He delivered 4 babies for the first time, 2 on his birthday.
How cool is that.
He has a very neat love interest/ partner. Doubt they will marry but they have been together since college days and before med school. She is into gardening, plant science, organic everything.
They are starting to raise rabbits and she wants to make wool from their furs.
She graduated in science (if I have that correct) she was top of her class too.

The scenery around the hut is gorgeous, a lot of land and just plain wilderness.
A large garden is forthcoming and a small one already in motion.

They made a slide from one tree to another and the kids took turns getting on it.

For me it was a day out that I did not want, I am getting more and more a homeperson. Son told me I had to go and see some people. I went.
I enjoyed it because I connected somewhat with a young girl named H. who asked me OUT LOUD questions about aging, she was most interested on how I felt now, without a partner, with vanity, with computers...she made my day.
Otherwise I would have felt like a fish out of water. Two people there age 80 and the rest a LOT of twenty something....
In the old days I would have been in the middle of it with stories and gabbing but the hearing loss puts truly a damper on things.
People with soft voices think that their screaming is on my level and most of the time it is a wasted effort on their part. There is just one level I understand.
Sabrina has it down path, even Bobby who is with me 24/7 does not always get it.

I get as much annoyed as the person talking to me, how well I remember, I had this with my mother. Her TV was so high that we could not stay in the room.
She said the "ears" did not work. I have my ears for both the TV's and I can read under titles pretty quickly but the sound in my ears is fabulous. So do enjoy my TV.The kids were all very polite and nice to me. They are not a bunch of tugs or dope addicts, they all have tremendous goals to make this a better world. Lets hope they can achieve some of them.

so now what?

My birthday luncheon was perfect, the weather gorgeous, the plant shop open at the Biltmore but I did not see anything I did not already have.
Next day Sabrina showed up with giant Zack and cleaned the shed. Bob's shed. Even so I had stored stuff there from the shop a decade ago, Bob had claimed this to be "his". He kept putting garbage in it and I gave up to fight with him over it.
Furtunately the garbage was mostly coke cans by the dozens and paper stuff from across the street garbage....I did not want to see it, my stomach was turning inside out. Brie unpacked stuff and shortly my yard looked like a flea market.
But at the end she found the goodies. Boxes still with china and most of all about 50 lbs of vintage linens.
She had promised me that nothing was going to come in the house (already a box empire not to mention a bead shop) but the linen sat next to the new washing machine.
Ouch! Big mistake.
I washed all day Sunday and Monday and set up the old ironing board and ironed and ironed non stop. I would take some ice tea and sit for a bit and then go back to the chore. Still delighted that they were saleable items.

Bob had not been into Ari's car since we brought it here.
Brie and I had gone to Texas to get her car and some of her belongings.
That was almost 4 years ago. Bob had to struggle to get the Texas title changed to NC, seems it is due to come any day now. So while the yard was a mess and Brie was
there he thought to empty the car and get it ready for sale.
I saw his face get whiter and whiter, he keeps his emotions inside. He could not hide it, he was hurting. So was I , I loved that girl, she was weird, she was brilliant , she helped hundreds of people in her profession, the underdog was her
aim to make life better for him or her, she had gorgeous tattoos covering her white gorgeous skin and I learned to love someone with tattoos. Unbelievable how narrow minded I had been. She loved my son, he loved her and she loved me.
Seeing her woolen shawl, her oriental bibelots, her passion for candles, and dozens of presents Bob got her from my shop at one time or another. It all came back.
Then Bobby found her perfume and that did him in, Sabrina and I too , the scent of Ari...it was a bit much.

So his items went into the house, now the kitchen looked like Portobello in London
pricing, washing, repacking all came into my full time slot.
I wanted it all out of sight like magic, gone forever.

So I had little time for anything else except getting pissed at the dentist as my
tooth (repaired Nov 2010) broke off to the gum line....
more on that tomorrow when I see the dentist....
did I say that the profession I dislike the most are dentists???

Did I say that Nick had a birthday I think he was 25 and delivered his first 2 babies all on the same day..........
Imagine that I insisted on coming to the USA when it was 1947 or so and now in 2013 my grandson is delivering American babies. Hope they were girls, boys always end up fighting around here. I must ask him.

80

OK I made it.
Today is the day, I am actually 80 and so far it feels good.
The day is gorgeous.
Spring is 4 weeks early in these parts and plants are coming up and
flowers are starting to bloom on most trees.

What is not kosher is that one of my gold fish died, I had him for years but for him to call it quits on my birthday is just not polite, after all I am a Pisces.

I requested in all honesty not to have a special party which the girls wanted but just be together and EAT, we shall do that tomorrow when no one is working and meet at the Bistro with Louis and Celia. Nothing more or less!

Presents are forbidden BUT knowing my kids who do not listen I said if you MUST then give me something for the garden, a seed, a little geranium.

Bobby found what I liked a kit for indoor mushrooms!!!!
Lee had that and had 3 or 4 harvests from it.

It is soaking now for 24 hours and after that....we shall see....hoping for lots of mushrooms. Bob and I both like them. If this is a vegetable (???) then it myst be the only vegetable he likes. He is allergic to veggies, he came that way at birth, his first words were: DO NOT LIKe THIS!!!!
I bribed him with little cars, soldiers, robots...still no dice. Now I give up altogether. He will never be a vegan or vegetarian.

I am going to relax today give myself a day off as soon as I finish the dishes...

79 11/12th

I hear the girls voices like it was a chant they did yesterday."Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you, you live in a zoo, you look like a monkey and you smell like one too" Giggles, Giggles, Giggles!!!
It was a yearly routine with all our birthdays, followed with the kisses and hugs and :are you baking a cake?

It was yesterday, was it not? This week I will be 80!!!!
The only birthday I did not like was "55", I was depressed it was cold and
I was working on an estate sale which was not going well due to ice on the road.
The combination had me upset.

55, I thought life is over, gosh what is there left for us? Bob is already 61, he is OLD, he is in his sixties.....but then the other side of the coin will be that in
a year he will have social security and Medicare....something to look forward to.

Since then I have not objected to the added birthdays.
When I reached 60, Rhonda was still a dr.'s wife and she arranged for a nice dinner in her huge house, most invited were other antique dealers I worked with every day. It was nice.

I do not like a lot of "stuff" and action for my birthday.
I always say that holidays and birthdays bring out the caring in people but I prefer to see that every day in small dosis. Don't bring me flowers when I am dead kind of a thing. I spoiled my mother in her last decades, filled her rooms with antiques and paintings. She lived in a gorgeous environment. She did not need to
be 80 to get a Val St Lambert vase.

My children take care of me every day. That is a HUGE birthday present. I need no more, I need nothing more to dust, wash or break. A plant for the garden , I said, if you must be obnoxious about this gift giving thing.
Bob got me the special poppies I wanted and they are thriving with our "hot" week.

We will have lunch at the Bistro in Biltmore, have a cheese plate and best of breads and a glass of wine. Two I allowed to be invited by the girls were
Celia and Louis. They stood by me for decades.

Two years ago, at this time, I was in a rehab learning to walk again on a broken ankle. My love had to be given over to strangers in a nursing home. I would not have bet a dime for me to still be alive by end of the year.
I was worn out, totally spent, did not give a damn about anything but Bob who I pictured in a hell hole. (He was n't) Our lives did not need to end that way I thought. I was ready to go to whatever is after this.
THIS right now for me was hell on earth. It could not get worse.....
well, I learned to walk, I was the star at the rehab, I insisted on more and more
excersizes I wanted to be home. 21 days I was there but it was a paradise compared by the rest of places. I was treated like Royalty.
My depression worsened as we watched Bob fail for the next 6 months.
By the time he left us I just thought I would never heal without him.
Then last year I continued the doctors paths, the c word in the kidney, removal of same and then a bad fall which crushed my lower back.
In my solitude I figured it was time to give up, Bob was gone 6 months and is it not the usual routine for people close to each other to join after that amount of time??

Somehow, out of the blue I have picked myself up in these last months and have decided that my life is worth to continue and not give up. I feel we have choice about a lot in our lives, if one wishes long enough to go then it will happen, I am sure of this, but if we give our life some meaning then perhaps we can still be of good cheer and love our kids and friends, the pets, the blossoms on the trees and the gorgeous white cloud I saw tonight. (Bob would have loved it, he was a cloud man).

I have survived a lot, abuse, a war, loss of babies, a bad marriage, RA, business failures at times, panic disorder etc...we all have these different challenges in life, I am just one of the whole, we have a choice, we fight for survival and
do not give up. I am just delighted, even proud, and excited that I made it till
the age of 80!!!!
Bring on the next decade!!!!
Happy Birthday, old broad, you deserve the smile wrinkles and the frown wrinkles? hell, you surely deserved them too!!!!!
At one time or another I was Jeannette, Janet (for Americans), Jeannot Van Melle, Huys, Kensinger and lived in Belgium, Montreal, New Jersey, Northern California,Nerja Spain and the gorgeous Blue Ridge Mountains in North Carolina.
I have been damn lucky!!!! I became an American in 1967 but still wished that I did not have to give up my Belgian identity which was the law then. Now you can have dual citizenship.
Happy Birthday!!!!!
OH I am premature, my birthday is March 15

HOW DO YOU SPELL CEMETERY

Being self taught in the English language I make a lot of mistakes but some words I NEVER remember how to spell. Cemetary is the one I insist should have an A. Neighborg should be the way I want it to be. I have notes on my computer with the correct spelling of these and some others. They will never register in my head which also has a form of dyslexia.

My odd life and lifestyle could make a psychiatrist go running back to school and become a bookkeeper.

I started as an lonely only child. My mother was brought up in a convent, to say that she was strict is putting it mildly. She did not know "grey" it was white or black.
The line had to be straight, no curves, nothing but perfection.

My father was not a hugging kind of man, he seemed hard to me but he was a policeman and took his job seriously, even at a time that murders were rare and stealing was more going into the fields and getting some potatoes out of the land. That was a quiet time and it was prewar.

I was petrified of my mother. She had a temper and she hit me hard for anything that I did badly. My father would sit in his corner and just say :"Do not hit her in the head!". She did not listen.

So by the time I hit High School which in my case was a vocational secretarial school , I was still lonely, had very few friends and was living in my own world.
I did not like school. I liked typing but the short hand in 2 different styles and languages had me very confused. In the evening I had daily drills of material dictated to me by Mom and then I had to reread it....it was unpleasant and I remember sitting in my chair just trembling and the scribbles in front of me just blending into nothing that made sense. Her eyes would get more and more angry and I read less and less. Hated school!!Hated Mother!!!

So I started to play hooky. I took the long walk to the cemetery. There was my grandmother and godmother, there was my Meme. She had left us when I was 4 but somehow I still fell connected to her. I'd sit by her grave and talked to her.
Then I'd walk around the old place and just took in all the sculptures in stones and granite. Many writers, artists and musicians were buried here. It had been one
of the popular places to come in the 19th century.
A pianist young woman had for tombstone a life size piano with the lid open and her image sitting on a bench in front of it. I always went to check on her.
Poets had streams of poetry written on large stones. Much later a carved out motorcycle was on a young man's tomb. This place is like a museum of statues and art work. The flower crowns on the stones were in porcelain and kept their colors over the decades until fleamarket people discovered they were saleable. They were Majolica in perfection.
My Meme was the first to be buried in what we called a "cellar" , it would eventually reunite the family, my grandfather in the 1960's , then their first daughter and last in 1993 my mom. Last year the earth opened up and swallowed up a row of tombs our family included.
There has been a restoration of sorts, all graves been identified with a new modern looking flat stone.

Back to my playing hooky, mother found out. I had to go to the principal with her and explain where I had been ...I told them....no one believed me...more questions...shaking of heads....went home and mother beat me with the poker...the mark stayed on my leg and one teacher told the principal. Mother back at her office in days. They did not protect kids then, beating kids was normal too but somehow the principal did manage to scold her in some way. We went home in silence.
Years later she asked "where did you go when you did not go to school?"
I said" cemetery". She shook her head. My Meme knew I had been there not once but many times even into adult hood. Mother never believed it.

So when we drove past old cemeteries I would want to see the stonework, the dates, the quotations, I just had a fascination with that. I outgrew it eventually and would it not be odd that I moved in a street which ends with "a cemetery".
The first few decades we would just drive by and Bobby would read the stones and make remarks like :Hey Mom this guy is named "Dedham" he does not need ham anymore does he? Bobby always had an audience with dad and I , he was such a joker.
Then I became a grandmother and had babies come and go early in the morning while
Mom's went to work. I would put them in their carriage and walk up the hill and around and around the old graveyard. Graves here go back to the middle 1800's.
They have tree trunks for the "Woodsmen" which must have been some association, someone odd and wealthy had been buried above ground and had a prism on the top which would reflect her image inside when the light was right. It became a
meeting place for teen agers and the prism was covered over with cement.
THE ANGEL is still there the one from Look Homeward Angel. People from all over the world come to see it. Now they built an iron gate around it to protect it from vandals.
http://www.cityofhendersonville.org/index.aspx?page=130

When walking the babies stopped then I would force Bob to walk with me all around the place so he would have his walking routine. He loved walking. He'd stop at the graves which had a special detail and point it out to.
And then came the puppies...first Toto and I we would walk till he could no more and gave up looking at me with pity black eyes "pick me up" he would beg and
we'd go home with him in my arms.

There are 4 miles of roads in the place, I was told by a worker, I find it hard to believe but they criss cross so much so perhaps it is true.
I have walked every inch of it now for years, I still read the names. I keep Bijou from messing up near graves, there is plenty of grass fields still left.
I say hello to "Charlie Hip" when I walk by, there are the names made famous in our town streets, the Hodges, the Brownings, Adams ,Justice, and so on...
I notice several who came from Sweden, Australia and wonder if they ever where homesick. My sacred place is on the corner as one walks in, in the middle of a plot of 21 small stones is the flag. All the men here are from WW1. I talk to them too ,they helped my grandparents and my mother and father.

Bijou knows all the curves, knows where to chase the squirrels and barks at the 3 crows who live there and make a racket. Now with the trees bare one can see the large squirrel nests, one tree has 4 of them, I call them the condo's. Must be a family group willing to live close together.

Early in the morning a cop sits in a shaded quiet corner near a fence, he comes there often , then another car appears and leaves...a rendez vous? an informer? someone bringing him coffee after a hard night shift? My mind wonders but I stay away from his car. He may just be taking a nap.

I visit my beloved daughter in law, the child who left us too soon and she shares her plot with her mother who came 2 months after her, filled with sadness she could not be without her.
I took plants from her garden and potted them in a heavy cement bowl so it will not fly away in the wind. The plants continue to grow ,they are hardy.

The cemetery is old and a new one with regulations is in another part of the city. I do not like regulations. The place where a mom had to leave her 12 years old is full of his toys, glued solidly to a stone, there is a GI Joe and little cars, often fresh flowers , the Mexican population now adds all sorts of statuary, no rules....the city goes around all this and mows and cleans but it is not like this sterile place with same size plaques and plastic flowers. Conformity in death too?

Across the street is the OTHER cemetery. It was and perhaps still is for African Americans. Then in a corner almost filled up is the Jewish cemetery, it is fenced off with rocks and iron works , the stones are lovely and have series of small
pebbles lines on top of them as is a custom in Jewish traditions.

I will never be here if I have my wishes carried out, I want to be the ashes in the stream in Pisgah Forrest, I want to follow Bob's ashes and all streams go into the French Broad River and eventually into the sea. This Piscean belongs there.

So this is my story and I am sticking to it. I love an old cemetery so do not lock me up just yet, I might become a cat lady and have 60 cats...then you can lock me up.

I can't find another thing to wash!

I should start the garden, I'd get plenty of dirty laundry.
Seriously I am delighted that I washed the kitchen curtains and removed the storm windows. Our house was built in 1926, in every window including the 9 French rounded windows they also built storm windows for them.
In the kitchen it makes me feel confined.
Husband used to argue with me when I wanted them out in February and if truth was know I probably wanted them out with the Christmas tree.
For me, when Christmas was over I was thinking SPRING , flowers and plants.

For the last two years with the boo boo's and band aids and tears by the gallons I did not give a damn about the enclosure of storm windows. I left them IN for 2 whole years...what was I thinking? Or better yet"when was I NOT thinking".
Little spiders made home between the spaces. They found heaven.

I got up this morning with this spring drive like the bear crawling out of his den ever so slowly and wondering what new life is around. It was freezing last night but warm during the day but if I do not want to plant Brussels sprouts, carrots and such this is not the time for planting my zinnias.

Looked at the windows and thought: Wash!!New Machine!!!Gentle cycle! opening the air ...curtains .....taking away the storm windows. YEAH!!!Yeah!! Spring is here.
I beamed all day with my accomplishment and then more HARDY poppies came in small plant pots, present from son, after the freezing nights they like it cool so I
can start there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Did I ever see a tree with tomatoes???Hirsch has the seeds for it.
Looks kind of weird, a climbing branch on trellis like a tree and big tomatoes
hanging over your head. Should I try or save my money???

Tonight no CNN no politics....a good night sleep....I do not know what I will tackle tomorrow.....

The sky is full of stars, very clear and cold, at Brie's house she must be able to see the Milky Way, here with city lights no such hope.

Spring but can we expect more trouble?

I am looking at flowers on eBay and at Lowes, some are way too early to risk now.
I ordered a couple of the large Livermore poppies, they come as plants and if they like where I put them they will multiply quickly, I had them before but now they are gone. They are temperamental, hoping this year I can devote more time to the garden.

Bobby asked what I wanted for my birthday and I said get me another poppy like this one and he ordered a bunch of them...whoopee!!!!!

I also ordered seeds of the Danish Poppy, I don't do well with seeds but for the poppies in general that is the way they like it, seed them early, they do like some colder climate to begin with. I have always the California poppies and last year they lasted till December. I am sure they will pop up again.

Ordered an Azalea which blooms all year...should be interesting and a Lilly which combines wicked colors of yellow and absolute black...
I can hear Bob telling me :"Jeannot I told you a hundred times black is not a color"
I know but this is absolutely black.

The old maple is in full bloom , the one across the street is too, looks like a orange/wine halo around the tree.

I broke the bank to get some expensive black seeds and the red cardinal brought his wife to the feeder, guess they are nesting nearby again.

My lungs open up with the joy of the smell of spring outside.
This will be good.
Some of my potted plants have eyes started .they survived the non winter!!Of course!!!Can t think of the name now for the life of me but I have about 30 different varieties.
Life is good when we can think of a garden and work in one.

Hosta, hosta hosta!!!!Dummy!!!!!!

THE OTHER CONNECTION

I am often thinking about the connections we, animal lovers, have which eludes some other people.
My mom for example did not like pets. She was allowed one in her apartment but she never thought about it, once in awhile she'd say "maybe I should have a bird". She never got one. When I was little and my father was still home we always had dogs and outdoor cats. After the war mother refused to have any more animals and father was gone so I was alone in my begging. I did get a turtle "Nico" a little thing that I brought to the office, taped a cord on his back and let him wander in the little grass plot, at 5 PM he went into my bag and home again.
When he died I threw him in the canal with many tears running down my face. I saw my mother's relief. Then I wanted fish, her response was that we did not have money for such frivolities. A friend gave me 4 little river fish which I put in a galvanized tub outside the house. Winter came and the tub top froze and I figured I had frozen fish in there. Wrong! Spring came, the water melted and 4 fish were frolicking about.
I managed to get married to early (19) and first thing I wanted was a dog.
Joe and I saved and went to a petshop and purchased a wire haired terrier.
They are very agile, nerveus dogs. Very loyal. We HAD to tell my mother as we were living with her, we had not asked permission.
She was at her usual vaudeville matine on saturday and we waltzed in with Spooky in our arms. She was not pleased.
Spooky became my child, I could not wait to get home and hug him, he was the best dog. He was so loved. BUT we were toying with papers to get to the USA.
Our sponsor was still in Karlsruhe in Germany with the army, his wife was there too.
They had a "Spooky" before we did, I had just been a copy cat.
So when time came to have to go to Canada first our sponsor came to get Spooky and promised to take good care of him till we were in the USA.
Paperwork played a number on us again, we were 2 years in Montreal waiting for the permanent visa. The sponsors were in NJ with Spooky.
We managed to get a few days visitors visa and drove to NJ in a beat up car (Studebaker) it used more oil than gasoline.
We were in heaven when we set foot on NJ soil at Camp Kilmer , Spooky came out but did not know us until I called him and he heard my voice. He came running like a wild stallion. For 3 days he never left my side, followed me in the bathroom and sat next to the shower till I came out.
We could not have a dog in our Montreal apartment and there was an issue of
quarantine for dogs so we had to once again leave my beloved Spooky.
We had hopes to be back for keeps very soon....once back in our routine of work in Canada we received a letter from NJ with sad news.
Spooky had just stopped eating after we left and lay down and died.
He was about 3 years old by then, it was not old age, it was too much for him to separate from me again. I cried forever or so it seemed.Much later in the USA....
We had a male Lassie later and a mixed sweetheart Julie who moved with us to Spain and back to the USA, she was from a shelter. We figured we spent more on air fare for her then on anything else. She became an old lady.
Then came Toto on election day when Kerry was running...Bob decided we would call him Kerry , then we changed it to Toto and Bob called him cat the next day...
Toto's end was too dramatic and it is still a video playing in my head since I
saw the fight between him and a large dog. Devastated I was and soon came Toto who
is NEVER ever more then 1 foot away from me. He cries when I go shopping and jumps 2 feet in the air when I come to the door. He sleeps so close to me that often I can feel his little heart beat. I feel sorry that my Mom never saw such a love.
Was it that she wanted the house immaculate? That she did not want anything to bother the perfection she wanted in life?
My cousin had a Newfoundlander (sp?) he drooled, he was a huge teddy bear, kind loving, my cousin's best friend. My mother hated to visit there because he had
a couch privilege. She would tell me that my cousin would give him a steak before she would eat meat, she loved him, she made sacrifices for him. Mother could not get it.
I was more of a cat person for a long time but then we had this Himalayan who was too lazy to clean his derriere, a mouse ran in front of him and he did not budge. He was gorgeous and just sat, friendship was not in his repertoire, he should have been a show cat , just pampered. He was also not a clean cat, that I have problems with, I kept him for several years and then daughter Sabrina took care of him for some more years, walking behind him and cleaning up after him. It took a lot of patience from us but we hung on to him in turns till he went to kittyland in the sky and I hope he is clean there.
Our kitty now was affectionate until Toto came in the house, madam is still not happy with the dogs now that wehave 3. She does go to sleep in Bob's room but during the day we see little of her.
What makes us different, the nuts who go gaga over pets and the ones who do not care at all for the animal kingdom.?????

excitement for the day

I have a brand new washing machine.
Can't remember when I had a new one last.
It seems that the kids ,mostly Rhonda, was moving all the time and we inherited her or Bobby's washing machine.
The last years of Bob's illness she worked like a slave, every day , every day large loads of bedding, she did her best.
So she gave up these past weeks , left the laundr4y quite wet and seemed to need a Depend diaper for her leaking.
I now have a brand new Maytag with new gadget like water saver and soap saver etc...I even get a $100 visa card from the state because I am energy efficient.
Love the darn thing. I washed stuff today which did not need washing.
What other excitement do I have in life?
Just keep the house rolling as best as I can with my budget and my best of health!!!!Thank you, Maytag I love you.

New machine

My grandfather used to order his three piece suit from the tailor and say:"This is the suit I will be buried in so make it nice".
He wore out 4 suits before it was his last one.
I bought a Maytag washing machine yesterday which is ultra modern in comparison to the old lady in the semi basement.
This one "weighs" your laundry and adds just the amount of water needed to wash the load, all automatic. Lowes had 10 percent off and State of N C had 100.00 off
if you buy ecology responding items.
So right there I had a great discount and they deliver for free and pick up the old one. Sears always charges for delivery!!!!
So I said to my daughters : "This is the last washing machine I will buy".
Answer came" "well they last about 20 years so that will be about right!
"Say what?"
I am excited, this old machine served me well, bought it at some estate sale years ago and the last 3 years of Bob's life I had to wash ALL the bedding of our Queen size bed ,every, every day!!! The girl worked hard.
Thank you Maytag you deserve kudos for that old lady and I will enjoy the new one.

Flags and the law.

I thought that Whitney was a power house singer with a voice so pure...I can't truly say that I was a big fan who followed her career because I did not know that in her last concert people had asked for their money back.
I did not know that the fall had been so enormous on her vocals , I read about the abuse now and then and shook my head hoping she could stop the down fall.
Not another Presley was my thought.

I watched about an hour of the funeral, no question about it, this is a different culture that I am not familiar with. The singing tributes never stopped and I hope that this would help her Mom and her child. It was an impressing lot of talents and expression of love.

I am just very puzzled about the flag at half mast in New Jersey.
What are the rules about that?
Do we have laws, suggestions, rules, put down somewhere on how to treat the flag and when to put it half mast???
My personal opinion is that NJ did go a bit over the top on that one.

WOMEN AND THEIR RIGHTS

I am beginning to wonder what in the heck is happening with our politicians and
how they stand on understanding our rights.....

I have experience in this matter ....October 28 1956 I delivered full term twin boys, healthy babies in all aspects but they arrived still born. I had an Xray 3 days before I delivered (on their due date) , first of all the xray did not even show I had twins, Dr. did not know I was having twins. BUT I stopped feeling life right after the Xray. Next day I rushed to the dr. and told him something was wrong. His answer was that just before birth the baby is quiet....did I believe him? Absolutely NOT.
I KNEW, I just knew something was wrong , this baby had been extremely busy (of course with 2 of them!) now the large expanded stomach felt like a rock, heavy and not moving.
This was my first pregnancy. The American child I wanted so very much.

Not much after this I read in the paper that John Hopkins had announced that Xrays were damaging to pregnancies.....I knew they hit it on the nail. I knew from experience.

Then on April 28 1960, 4 years after the loss of the twins I was expecting and in pain in the hospital. The baby was just not wanting to see this world.
Push as hard as I could, no baby.
The same dr. who had delivered my twins (and in the interim my first American girl in 1958) said he just needed an xray to see the position ...I started to tell the dr. that he just was NOT going to give me an Xray. Do a C section, do whatever but NO X Ray....he turned to my then husband and asked :"Joe, what do you think? You can sign for her, we do not need her signature!". Joe signed.
I screamed all the way down the hall to the Xray room and twisted and turned
when they wanted to do the work. I just KNEW I would loose this baby too and I was not going to give in.
But they (the MEN with their rights) won.
Lucky my Sabrina was a fighter too and she decided to come and join us, she had yellow jaundice but was OK after a few days.

For the young ones: they did not have ultra sound in those days and Xrays were common....the women had no say so or rights about their bodies.
I even picked a Jewish doctor because I knew the doctrine of the church , I was still a Catholic then, a Catholic Dr. then would have to save the child before the mother. I was not a selfish human being but I just did not see how my irresponsible husband who was still a child himself was going to take care of a baby without a mother.

My best friend and I often laughed at that time because she was Jewish and she
picked the Catholic Dr. The two OB-Gyn's were the best in the town.

I am not sure of the laws updates at this point, I would truly hope that in ALL cases the woman has a right what should be done with her body.
I would never have been able to have an abortion that is not in me but that is not to say that one should not have the right to choose. The church can dictate what they want I am my own person, I have to take responsability for my actions.
I listened to priests in my youth only to find out that they did NOT follow
the rules of the church ....they did not lead by example. Why tell me what to do,.. furthermore why should a government tell me what I can do about my personal life.

I am on a soap box and have a hard time telling what I feel but I will never forget the birthday of my daughter when 2 men took over and they won.

Happy Valentine day to everyone

BIJOU SHOP

After Bob passed I felt so lost, no one to take care off anymore but myself and that was boring. In a foolish moment I remembered how in the 1970's we did a loot of beading, actually knotting beads of all colors. We sold them in Bob's shop.
It was the age of Acquarius and hippies loved beads!!
Bob and I even went to Venice and came back with a suitcase of Venetian beads.
They were gone as soon as we came home. We laughed and thought to make it a career to fly to Venice and come back and make necklaces.
The scenario came back to me and I figured I could do some "knotting" for my own jewelry which needed a lot of work.
The thought did not end there. Jeannot has retail veins. My first adventure being that I sold chewing gum in school from the soldiers who came to our house
and gave me the gum for free. I hated chewing gum. So I became the "dealer" in school for a bad habit.
My francs bought me chocolate.
Anyway....I started to visit bead shops, they are in every town, even in our small town, I looked at the necklaces for sale and the wheels started to turn.
I actually thought that I had the talent to put some necklaces together in the style of today. A friend recommended Fire Mountain Gems and I started to buy stones like jasper, onyx, agate and smaller glass beads.
I sat at the kitchen table gathering all these goodies and could hardly sleep anymore. Beads came into my dreams and I decided I would sell them at Etsy or eBay.

Then Sabrina heard of a shop opening up as a craft/antique mini mall on her town.
She said she'd help set up if I wanted to try. I doubted myself, I started to do some simple necklaces and got more and more adventurous. By Feb 1 2011, I had a space of about 9 x 10. Furniture for display was acquired at the thrift shops and
I was in business.

Being so in love with my Maltese named Bijou, I decided to call my shop "Maison Bijou". It rattles my french side of the brain a bit. Bijoux with X is plural jewelry, Bijou without the X is simply "Jewel" but I am still going with that as
I had my little friend Bijou in mind.

As summer came along I got braver and started to buy large quantities of vintage jewels, I repaired, renewed some stones, clasps etc...and started to sell them
as 3.00. I figured I was not going to go for BIG bucks , this is a recession and women do like to get a new "bling" or two. With 3 and 5 bucks they can find something in my shop which is better that the junk now on the markets made in...whatever.

I did well. I was not going to buy a yacht or even have a Belgian trip but I was so busy and so dedicated that even my own health did not bother me so much as did me breaking my back. That put me to rest for awhile. The cancer and kidney was just a quick thought.

By end 2011 we found out that the store was going to get bigger adding another wing. I have no idea what my BP was doing, I was not going to check it, I was doubling my creations and gathering other stuff from my storage. I was ready for shop 2.

Opening was last Saturday but I could not make it due to bad weather but here is a bit of an idea of the second "Maison Bijou shop"

closet not closed and I do not remember how to correct

the previous message!!!!!!

My Valentine

Bob and I married on Valentine Day 1969.
He was my everything and I was his.
We were attached at the hip and when he became ill with Alzheimer it devastated our life.
He never understood it nor acknowledged it.
I closed my antique shop and started to sell on eBay.
For awhile he was my mailing manager, he did a good job too, with the exception that he used o9ur bath towels packing the fragile stuff. I figured that out when people wrote me thank you emails. Then noticed the closed getting very empty!
He did not understand my objections, he thought this was what he should do.
I bought cheaper rags!
In 2002 on our anniversary, I hugged him with best wishes and kisses all over his face, he looked strange, I repeated "Anniversary"! "Marriage"!
He smiled ran to his mail room and came back with our label and his message,
he was so proud ! I glued it on my kitchen wall, I see it dozens of times a day.
Then I am reminded that he loved me so much and if he could he still would.
I miss him more every day and I thought it was going to get better but I am mistaken.
I love you and I always will!!!!

Elderly parents and kids...

I write to several of my peers and the daily emails I get are mostly about problems we are having with children.
Now our children are mostly in their 40's or 50's or later but are having problems either with spouses, money (that especially) emotions, changes in the hormones,friendships, health for sure, and the list goes on.
We are near the end of this journey and are not able to help.
Most of us are on limited income, have doctors who are retiring on us and can't advice on the new load of MD's and gadgets to get us alive and stay alive, our journey's into matrimony were quite different and when we bought a house we thought it was the best investment we ever made.

Decades ago my mother in law who was then 83 years told me that she was
happy to be near the end of life as she could not keep up with the changes.

I try to keep up but I am exhausted when I hear their problems.
Life goes on with different challenges.
It is how we can deal with them without 24 different Life Masters and Guru's.

If these Master planners are doing so very well, check out their household when the doors are closed, is everything perfect there? I doubt it.

If a financial advisor is so good, ask him how his portfolio is doing? Does he need an advisor too?

100 years ago both my grandmothers were beaten on a daily basis.
The husband was King, the supporter of the family, the man who could have mistresses and the wife look the other way.
How much has changed???
In every town in this country there is a shelter for battered wives....
say no more.