Never has my garden been so neglected as this year. The broken ankle had a lot to do with it. So I let everything grow.
Including weeds.
Conclusion: In all our 36 years here I have never seen so many butterflies and bees, birds of all sorts too. It is just great.
So obviously they do not know the difference between buttercups which invade all, wild morning glories, dandelions and my 35.00 special Japanese maple also in bloom.
I think I will let it be till next spring and then maybe, just maybe, I may do some weeding.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Trying to see if I can still do this
Handknotting beads was one of our hobbies during the 1960's and 1970's, hippy time.
Bob and I worked on hundreds of necklaces. So I decided to make some perhaps for presents if I can still get the hang of it.
I do not have all of the materials yet, yikes they cost money!
Used to be so simple, we had a choice of perhaps 2 or3 cords now there are all sorts of gadgets, findings, and enough to spent your allowance in 10 minutes time.
They even have a knotter now which I do not like. Played a bit with what I did have this afternoon , made quite a few mistakes but I learned a ton from them.
Except for the hemp all pieces were
vintage.
I think I will try a few more tomorrow.
Bob and I worked on hundreds of necklaces. So I decided to make some perhaps for presents if I can still get the hang of it.
I do not have all of the materials yet, yikes they cost money!
Used to be so simple, we had a choice of perhaps 2 or3 cords now there are all sorts of gadgets, findings, and enough to spent your allowance in 10 minutes time.
They even have a knotter now which I do not like. Played a bit with what I did have this afternoon , made quite a few mistakes but I learned a ton from them.
Except for the hemp all pieces were
vintage.
Finished with painting
Have a lazy streak
I had all these topics in my head to write about but did not get much computer time in this week.
Excuses: still too hot for me.
secondly: still sleeping during the day
thyroid not being very nice.
thirdly: started to sort the bead stuff and trying to start.
fourth: lets call it what it is, a mild depression AGAIN.
Visits to Bob are getting harder and harder but he messed with my head or did I let him mess with my head?
For a long time now he would stroke my hair the way he always did.
He would try and get some order in my strands while we sat at the table.
He would always comment on what I was wearing and touch the fabrics.
(I should not buy large flower prints!!he said)
So he continued to do that at the nursing home. The girls and I thought he remembered this somewhere deep in his memory bank.
Not so, I thought I was so special, we walked down the hall and one of the mean ladies sat in her wheelchair cussing at a nurse, she has hair (my color) but down her shoulders, he went over and touched her hair very gently.
She did not notice which is a good thing, she is a fighter.
My bubble burst. He does this to others too so he did not remember me.
He is and always will be a very gentle man.
He had fallen again but he is made of iron. Seems he does linger too often in a room and checks out the chests of drawers.
Well, he did this here in our house for years and years. One time all my underpants were gone, I found them with his socks hidden under all his stuff.
No, he never was a cross dresser do not think he had intentions of becoming one.
I wish I out of this "black cloud over my head" feeling.
Not my nature to be so gloomy all the time, I hate it.
Excuses: still too hot for me.
secondly: still sleeping during the day
thyroid not being very nice.
thirdly: started to sort the bead stuff and trying to start.
fourth: lets call it what it is, a mild depression AGAIN.
Visits to Bob are getting harder and harder but he messed with my head or did I let him mess with my head?
For a long time now he would stroke my hair the way he always did.
He would try and get some order in my strands while we sat at the table.
He would always comment on what I was wearing and touch the fabrics.
(I should not buy large flower prints!!he said)
So he continued to do that at the nursing home. The girls and I thought he remembered this somewhere deep in his memory bank.
Not so, I thought I was so special, we walked down the hall and one of the mean ladies sat in her wheelchair cussing at a nurse, she has hair (my color) but down her shoulders, he went over and touched her hair very gently.
She did not notice which is a good thing, she is a fighter.
My bubble burst. He does this to others too so he did not remember me.
He is and always will be a very gentle man.
He had fallen again but he is made of iron. Seems he does linger too often in a room and checks out the chests of drawers.
Well, he did this here in our house for years and years. One time all my underpants were gone, I found them with his socks hidden under all his stuff.
No, he never was a cross dresser do not think he had intentions of becoming one.
I wish I out of this "black cloud over my head" feeling.
Not my nature to be so gloomy all the time, I hate it.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Thanks for the article SW
a friend sent me an article from the New York paper about feeding in the end of Alzheimer disease.
To my surprise they are saying the same I have been saying for weeks.
"Feed him a banana!!!"
I just said that because that what he ate a lot at home, that and 4 yes four gallons of milk a week.
The article also states that research showed that tube feedings do not prolong life. They are uncomfortable, often rejected, harder to swallow and do not have the human touch.
A human touch with handfeeding is recommended and for sure the bananas!
Who knew that I was so smart? The survey did not call me.
To my surprise they are saying the same I have been saying for weeks.
"Feed him a banana!!!"
I just said that because that what he ate a lot at home, that and 4 yes four gallons of milk a week.
The article also states that research showed that tube feedings do not prolong life. They are uncomfortable, often rejected, harder to swallow and do not have the human touch.
A human touch with handfeeding is recommended and for sure the bananas!
Who knew that I was so smart? The survey did not call me.
Painting and panting
finding out that painting a room at age 78
is not like it was at age 50 something.
is not like it was at age 50 something.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
August and the heat is back
We had it cool for a few days but ,of course, it had to come back.
The moods around here are getting a bit lighter, we are finally at the end of paper work for Bob. Two lawyers had done some of it, years ago and both screwed us up by not filing what had to be done....enter lawyer numero 3.
Where are the pro's who take your money and do their jobs????
By saturday we should be done with the office/work room.
Bobby painting the top and I what I can reach. I am not 40 anymore.
I am exhausted after 3 hours painting.
Then I need a map. Where are the days that I just got out a brush and finished a room in 2 or 3 days.
I could not wait for Rhonda to finish, I was getting clutter fever from moving furniture here and there, curtains , knick knacks ~all fragile~ and between all that 3 dogs not knowing where to walk and forcing themselves into holes to small for them.
My hair is falling out from psoriasis and thyroid problems but I was ready to pull it out!!!!
I still have to paint my bedroom but I think I will wait for cooler weather.
Friday we visit Bob again and my heart wants to run there. Yet when I get there and see him I am totally in shock ,disbelief, and every organ in my body starts to ache for him.
It is not fair, a gentle , caring, loving,very spiritual man and a shell is left, not even a memory anymore of what he had lived for.
I love and I hate to go there but no one can keep me away.
The moods around here are getting a bit lighter, we are finally at the end of paper work for Bob. Two lawyers had done some of it, years ago and both screwed us up by not filing what had to be done....enter lawyer numero 3.
Where are the pro's who take your money and do their jobs????
By saturday we should be done with the office/work room.
Bobby painting the top and I what I can reach. I am not 40 anymore.
I am exhausted after 3 hours painting.
Then I need a map. Where are the days that I just got out a brush and finished a room in 2 or 3 days.
I could not wait for Rhonda to finish, I was getting clutter fever from moving furniture here and there, curtains , knick knacks ~all fragile~ and between all that 3 dogs not knowing where to walk and forcing themselves into holes to small for them.
My hair is falling out from psoriasis and thyroid problems but I was ready to pull it out!!!!
I still have to paint my bedroom but I think I will wait for cooler weather.
Friday we visit Bob again and my heart wants to run there. Yet when I get there and see him I am totally in shock ,disbelief, and every organ in my body starts to ache for him.
It is not fair, a gentle , caring, loving,very spiritual man and a shell is left, not even a memory anymore of what he had lived for.
I love and I hate to go there but no one can keep me away.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
August
for a change it was nice and cool yesterday. Hot weather back on the way for the coming week.
The dreams are horrible.
I am now in the habit of reading in bed till 12 or 1 , afraid to fall asleep.
This whole night I was showing Bob fold over in his chair and barely knowing where he was or what was going on.
Every time a person would come I would show them that Bob is sick.
I woke up with tears running down my face. Not enough to cry during the day, I have to do it my sleep too?
I was doing so well...............
maybe when this office is back into shape and I can start on the jewelry it will be a nice diversion.
so....back to painting, perhaps I will have this done tomorrow.
The dreams are horrible.
I am now in the habit of reading in bed till 12 or 1 , afraid to fall asleep.
This whole night I was showing Bob fold over in his chair and barely knowing where he was or what was going on.
Every time a person would come I would show them that Bob is sick.
I woke up with tears running down my face. Not enough to cry during the day, I have to do it my sleep too?
I was doing so well...............
maybe when this office is back into shape and I can start on the jewelry it will be a nice diversion.
so....back to painting, perhaps I will have this done tomorrow.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
after the storm
comes the calm.
I was so angry this morning when I blogged. Now near bed time I am exhausted but in better spirits.
I know that I just can't change the situation.
It is the nature of this disease , the food is of little interest and the afflicted becomes skeleton like.
It is hard to watch, I keep telling myself that if I could have him back home again I could try and feed him more.
To what end? to prolong this horrible state he is in?
How unkind of me.
Do I want him to continue like this, a mere shell of what he was?
Am I crying more for myself or for him?
Good news dept.:
The kids are trying to readjust the marriage, they had a bad bump in the road. I think they can make it work.
28years is long stretch and most of it was good. A relief to my ears today.
I was so angry this morning when I blogged. Now near bed time I am exhausted but in better spirits.
I know that I just can't change the situation.
It is the nature of this disease , the food is of little interest and the afflicted becomes skeleton like.
It is hard to watch, I keep telling myself that if I could have him back home again I could try and feed him more.
To what end? to prolong this horrible state he is in?
How unkind of me.
Do I want him to continue like this, a mere shell of what he was?
Am I crying more for myself or for him?
Good news dept.:
The kids are trying to readjust the marriage, they had a bad bump in the road. I think they can make it work.
28years is long stretch and most of it was good. A relief to my ears today.
Horrible days
It does not get any easier ............
call yesterday.........he fell, did not get hurt.
Nutritionist talking to us
Alzheimer nurse too
questions about when they will take different measures to get him to eat.
His wish would be not to prolong this and we have the paperwork in order for that.
He is losing 1 1/2 lbs a week now. at 126lbs right now, in march before I broke my ankle he was 145.
They say he is also more violent.
He sat with his eyes closed, looked up slightly from the side of his bowed head and took my hands and held on.
Rubbing his back hurts me, it is all bones sticking out.
He then put his hands on this back as to make a cushion there.
Nurse said he is not in pain, I think he is what does she know.
They had short sleeves on him, he is always wearing long sleeves, he is always cold so we changed him.
He has a new room mate, a luny bin, sorry, named Moe.
I am angry, I am hurting, I do not know how to handle all the emotions right now.
Zack came with us. He is a big boy with a soft heart. It looked like he was afraid to touch this tiny man.
Paper work finally in order, more costs for lawyer.
I am a rag today.
Bobby started to show me the beginning of the film....basterds.
The first scene at the Frenchman's house became my film, the girls looking out from the clothe line and see them coming, the interrogation became my story. I may sound like a drama queen but the film totally changed to me standing there, the house being searched, drawers being opened , men with ugly faces, ugly uniforms, men I had learned to hate.
Me standing there looking at the regulator clock, knowing my dad's gun is in the bonnet of the clock.
If they find that, I was told, we will all die immediately.
My 8 or 9 years have not taught me that I should not stare at danger.
The sound of the boots on our bare wood steps are loud. Their language is loud. I hate it.
Father is talking in German to them, my mother is frozen near the stove, rubbing her hands or folding her arms.
Her eyes get grey when she is angry, they are almost black now. I worry when I see that look, it is usually for my benefit when I did something wrong.
They leave satisfied that there is nothing here and they did not like this house to move into.
My father, a cop, (without weapons during the war) must have done some fast talking. He knows them, he was 7 when they invaded Belgium and his father was taken as a prisoner, leaving his mother with 8 children and no food.
He had learned early to steal in their camp and bring food home. He knew too much about them.
The day at the nursing home, the lawyer, the doctor, now the beginning of the movie and I was, am still, a total wreck. While this is going on in my old head my child is having issues in her marriage and can't stop crying.
I go to bed wondering why I had to stay alive, I was in real danger for so many years, so were my parents. They managed to end their lives in peace and quiet and some contentment.
I just do not like the way mine is going right now. I am fucked up today, plain english just fucked up and fed up.
call yesterday.........he fell, did not get hurt.
Nutritionist talking to us
Alzheimer nurse too
questions about when they will take different measures to get him to eat.
His wish would be not to prolong this and we have the paperwork in order for that.
He is losing 1 1/2 lbs a week now. at 126lbs right now, in march before I broke my ankle he was 145.
They say he is also more violent.
He sat with his eyes closed, looked up slightly from the side of his bowed head and took my hands and held on.
Rubbing his back hurts me, it is all bones sticking out.
He then put his hands on this back as to make a cushion there.
Nurse said he is not in pain, I think he is what does she know.
They had short sleeves on him, he is always wearing long sleeves, he is always cold so we changed him.
He has a new room mate, a luny bin, sorry, named Moe.
I am angry, I am hurting, I do not know how to handle all the emotions right now.
Zack came with us. He is a big boy with a soft heart. It looked like he was afraid to touch this tiny man.
Paper work finally in order, more costs for lawyer.
I am a rag today.
Bobby started to show me the beginning of the film....basterds.
The first scene at the Frenchman's house became my film, the girls looking out from the clothe line and see them coming, the interrogation became my story. I may sound like a drama queen but the film totally changed to me standing there, the house being searched, drawers being opened , men with ugly faces, ugly uniforms, men I had learned to hate.
Me standing there looking at the regulator clock, knowing my dad's gun is in the bonnet of the clock.
If they find that, I was told, we will all die immediately.
My 8 or 9 years have not taught me that I should not stare at danger.
The sound of the boots on our bare wood steps are loud. Their language is loud. I hate it.
Father is talking in German to them, my mother is frozen near the stove, rubbing her hands or folding her arms.
Her eyes get grey when she is angry, they are almost black now. I worry when I see that look, it is usually for my benefit when I did something wrong.
They leave satisfied that there is nothing here and they did not like this house to move into.
My father, a cop, (without weapons during the war) must have done some fast talking. He knows them, he was 7 when they invaded Belgium and his father was taken as a prisoner, leaving his mother with 8 children and no food.
He had learned early to steal in their camp and bring food home. He knew too much about them.
The day at the nursing home, the lawyer, the doctor, now the beginning of the movie and I was, am still, a total wreck. While this is going on in my old head my child is having issues in her marriage and can't stop crying.
I go to bed wondering why I had to stay alive, I was in real danger for so many years, so were my parents. They managed to end their lives in peace and quiet and some contentment.
I just do not like the way mine is going right now. I am fucked up today, plain english just fucked up and fed up.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Lunch on Wednesday
an email arrived,
said my friend:
we want you to join us Wednesday for lunch at the cute little inn on Howard street.
We are celebrating.
I answered : Celebrating what?
He answered : Celebrating Wednesdays!
How lucky to have friends who celebrate Wednesdays!!!!!
I love it.
said my friend:
we want you to join us Wednesday for lunch at the cute little inn on Howard street.
We are celebrating.
I answered : Celebrating what?
He answered : Celebrating Wednesdays!
How lucky to have friends who celebrate Wednesdays!!!!!
I love it.
word for the day:
nesting
simplify
painting
hot as hell summer
delay vacation
back to nesting and painting
no time for writing
simplify
painting
hot as hell summer
delay vacation
back to nesting and painting
no time for writing
Monday, July 12, 2010
Cheap entertainment
and I mean cheap.
Big Brother started again.
I know it is the most stupid show around but I was curious who was going to join this year.
It was entertaining (?)this time they have a few people with brains , one guy member of Mensa and another with a PHD etc....then there is a Jewish guy who wears a yarmulke , quite religious and only eats Kosher and will go home quite skinny, I am sure.
Then there is the Vegas girl with boobs much larger than Dolly, she does not need to swim, she floats.
She announces on the first evening:"I am just not a stupid bit boob girl, I have brains too. Oh did you see that we have a Jewish guy here, he is wearing his Yom Kippur.".
OK, she could have called it a mitre .
Sometimes it pays to shut the mouth!!!
Big Brother started again.
I know it is the most stupid show around but I was curious who was going to join this year.
It was entertaining (?)this time they have a few people with brains , one guy member of Mensa and another with a PHD etc....then there is a Jewish guy who wears a yarmulke , quite religious and only eats Kosher and will go home quite skinny, I am sure.
Then there is the Vegas girl with boobs much larger than Dolly, she does not need to swim, she floats.
She announces on the first evening:"I am just not a stupid bit boob girl, I have brains too. Oh did you see that we have a Jewish guy here, he is wearing his Yom Kippur.".
OK, she could have called it a mitre .
Sometimes it pays to shut the mouth!!!
Sunday, July 11, 2010
World Cup 2010
last game
Holland versus Spain
I love them both.
Lived 20 years only 7 km away from Dutch border.
Lived 5 years in Southern Spain.
Hard to pick a fave.
I may be leaning towards Spain, I love the SOUTHERN Spanish people.
Love them Andalucian's.
Buena Suerta!
I will be glued in my seat this afternoon
Holland versus Spain
I love them both.
Lived 20 years only 7 km away from Dutch border.
Lived 5 years in Southern Spain.
Hard to pick a fave.
I may be leaning towards Spain, I love the SOUTHERN Spanish people.
Love them Andalucian's.
Buena Suerta!
I will be glued in my seat this afternoon
Sleeping partner
Hard to get old habits out of the old head.
Wake up in a daze during the night ~as usual~ feel of Bob is still there , yes, i can feel his body against mine. We are OK, he is not up and he is not lost.
Back to deep sleep.
Crack of dawn Bijou decides he has to pee so he licks my face till I wake up.
Dazed I turn around the familiar "body" is replaced by a warm Maltese.
Somehow during my sleep I do not know the difference.
Perhaps that is a good thing as I then continue to have a good night's rest.
Wake up in a daze during the night ~as usual~ feel of Bob is still there , yes, i can feel his body against mine. We are OK, he is not up and he is not lost.
Back to deep sleep.
Crack of dawn Bijou decides he has to pee so he licks my face till I wake up.
Dazed I turn around the familiar "body" is replaced by a warm Maltese.
Somehow during my sleep I do not know the difference.
Perhaps that is a good thing as I then continue to have a good night's rest.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
A good day
't was a good day today, I ran around smiling, forgetting most of the time that I limp a bit. Forgetting the ouch now and then and just writing and smiling.
Saw the game Germany~Spain.
You can guess who I rooted for.
They won!
Now Sunday the finals for first and second place : Holland and Spain
I am fond of both places.
Growing up 7 km from the border and then having 5 great years at the Costa del Sol, Spain.
Even the very very poor kids in our village would kick around a "football" as they called it. You don't need thousands of dollars in equipment to hone that sport.
So either one who wins I will be happy with. A nice position to be in.
Now what made me smile again all day?
a nice letter from my friend LM.
An invitation for lunch on Friday with C and L.
A cool office. Thanks to the portable A C,
trying not to think about the electric bill it will bring.
Bobby in very good spirits. Love that kid, well, "man".
On to bed!
Saw the game Germany~Spain.
You can guess who I rooted for.
They won!
Now Sunday the finals for first and second place : Holland and Spain
I am fond of both places.
Growing up 7 km from the border and then having 5 great years at the Costa del Sol, Spain.
Even the very very poor kids in our village would kick around a "football" as they called it. You don't need thousands of dollars in equipment to hone that sport.
So either one who wins I will be happy with. A nice position to be in.
Now what made me smile again all day?
a nice letter from my friend LM.
An invitation for lunch on Friday with C and L.
A cool office. Thanks to the portable A C,
trying not to think about the electric bill it will bring.
Bobby in very good spirits. Love that kid, well, "man".
On to bed!
Visit to Shuller
Yesterday was not a fun day.
I kept putting it off.
Went to Funeral Parlor and made arrangements for Bob. Since I and him wanted nothing but cremation I told Mr.Shuller that he was not going to make money on us. I was right his lowest package deal for cremation was something like 2800.00 , we only needed 1100.00 of his services.
He is the best man, he is kind, does not push you on anything and he took care of our Ari a few years ago. He is a Southern Gentleman. I think he is Southern. Oh well.
It was noon when we left, I am not a drinker and I wanted a stiff drink.
Instead I did what I do better, ate and went shopping.
I spent too much but that the hay.
I have to have a couple of vices.
Still if I had been near my friend L I would have had a few glasses of wine and cheese and just been under the table in no time. I am a cheap drunk.
She is now in Mass.
Old Bob was having a class and we peaked in the glass door , he sat sound asleep in his chair. He thought it was all boring I am sure. We left, we did not want to wake him or disturb the class.
We saw him and that is what matters as he does not remember us.
Back to my old hobby.
During the hippy time, late sixties, we lived in California and had a shop.
Bob, his friend Allen and I we knotted beads until our fingers were raw~slight exaggeration here~ so I am going to get back at it. My new~old hobby.
So I needed equipment. when did I need a magnifying glass with a light no less? They have a special tool to knot now???Where was that in 1968?
Walk into Michaels one day and see the beads. Pure heaven! My favorites since I went to Venice in 1969 are the milifiori ones (one thousand flowers) glass beads. Now you can make your own in resin and classes are everywhere.
Who would have thought?
So it will be a new adventure.
I am no longer looking to sell anything but if I get a surplus I can always give them to the thrift stores.
First I have tons to repair of my own collection.
Walking yesterday without a cane (I did forget it) and shoes , was a new experience. The shoes not so hot, the equilibrium a lot better, the swelling not as bad as a week ago. We are getting along just swell (remember that word?) my ankle and I. I am happy with the handsome Dr. Bones.
Honestly, he has a silk shirt on and silk tie and always admired Sabrina's jewelry. I am there and forget my questions, one can be 78 but still enjoy looking at a gorgeous man.
Time to put the AC on, it is getting warm in here.
I kept putting it off.
Went to Funeral Parlor and made arrangements for Bob. Since I and him wanted nothing but cremation I told Mr.Shuller that he was not going to make money on us. I was right his lowest package deal for cremation was something like 2800.00 , we only needed 1100.00 of his services.
He is the best man, he is kind, does not push you on anything and he took care of our Ari a few years ago. He is a Southern Gentleman. I think he is Southern. Oh well.
It was noon when we left, I am not a drinker and I wanted a stiff drink.
Instead I did what I do better, ate and went shopping.
I spent too much but that the hay.
I have to have a couple of vices.
Still if I had been near my friend L I would have had a few glasses of wine and cheese and just been under the table in no time. I am a cheap drunk.
She is now in Mass.
Old Bob was having a class and we peaked in the glass door , he sat sound asleep in his chair. He thought it was all boring I am sure. We left, we did not want to wake him or disturb the class.
We saw him and that is what matters as he does not remember us.
Back to my old hobby.
During the hippy time, late sixties, we lived in California and had a shop.
Bob, his friend Allen and I we knotted beads until our fingers were raw~slight exaggeration here~ so I am going to get back at it. My new~old hobby.
So I needed equipment. when did I need a magnifying glass with a light no less? They have a special tool to knot now???Where was that in 1968?
Walk into Michaels one day and see the beads. Pure heaven! My favorites since I went to Venice in 1969 are the milifiori ones (one thousand flowers) glass beads. Now you can make your own in resin and classes are everywhere.
Who would have thought?
So it will be a new adventure.
I am no longer looking to sell anything but if I get a surplus I can always give them to the thrift stores.
First I have tons to repair of my own collection.
Walking yesterday without a cane (I did forget it) and shoes , was a new experience. The shoes not so hot, the equilibrium a lot better, the swelling not as bad as a week ago. We are getting along just swell (remember that word?) my ankle and I. I am happy with the handsome Dr. Bones.
Honestly, he has a silk shirt on and silk tie and always admired Sabrina's jewelry. I am there and forget my questions, one can be 78 but still enjoy looking at a gorgeous man.
Time to put the AC on, it is getting warm in here.
Monday, July 5, 2010
4th of July or are we the 5th
I am going to be a wreck all week to figure out what day it is.
OK so it is Monday and the garbage did get picked up but no mail.
Got it!Etched it in my brain!
Tomorrow Tuesday and out day with Sabrina , more paper work to be done.
Hair cut too. Visit with Bob.
I am getting antsy about the trip to Destin. It will be with a lot of young people, should be fun. The rule is no talk about politics nor religion.
We all have different ideas there ,so it is better to have fun and leave discussions for another time.
Will there be oil on the beach is another matter. There is oil in Pensacola.
Not that far away. The young grandsons have plans to go and help, daughter who bosses me quite a bit said I am to stay put and enjoy the beach even from the porch of the house. Rest the leg, rest the ankle, do not fall again!!!
Orders, orders, orders.
The 4th was mighty quiet here in our cottage but I am starting to like it that way.
I am upset about my nightmares , then I do not sleep well and have to play catch up during the day.
My guru spiritual friend from the 1980.s was a no nonsense Brit and he told me that dreams were "rubbish".
But, I have to wonder why I keep dreaming of the sky full of airplanes, it is almost covering all the blue and the clouds. I am watching with people and I tell them all to hide in ditches.
Often it follows with parachutes and strange looking people coming to great us, some nights they are friendly, some night they want to kill us.
I am always frightened and shivering and wake up being terrified.
This has been going on for several months now.
Of course I have lived this several times as a child, the planes did come very low to hit the electrical plant and I was trained to run in a ditch when outdoors.
Could this come back up after all these years?
It is mixed with another dream , I have had that one for years now.
I am packing, often stuff we carried in the shop (did we not pack every week end for the shows?) then I have to get on a plane, a car, a van, a train, and I always miss it. No money, lost my tickets, Bob is sick, have too much stuff (that's for sure) I just cant get home and I am crushed and do not know how to solve it all.
Perhaps the mess left in Bob's hoarding studio is coming alive in my dream.
I dont know but I am sure not happy about these 2 in particular.
Almost always Bob is ill with Alzheimer.
It can't leave me even in my sleep.
C.B.said Rubbish Rubbish
is he right?
OK so it is Monday and the garbage did get picked up but no mail.
Got it!Etched it in my brain!
Tomorrow Tuesday and out day with Sabrina , more paper work to be done.
Hair cut too. Visit with Bob.
I am getting antsy about the trip to Destin. It will be with a lot of young people, should be fun. The rule is no talk about politics nor religion.
We all have different ideas there ,so it is better to have fun and leave discussions for another time.
Will there be oil on the beach is another matter. There is oil in Pensacola.
Not that far away. The young grandsons have plans to go and help, daughter who bosses me quite a bit said I am to stay put and enjoy the beach even from the porch of the house. Rest the leg, rest the ankle, do not fall again!!!
Orders, orders, orders.
The 4th was mighty quiet here in our cottage but I am starting to like it that way.
I am upset about my nightmares , then I do not sleep well and have to play catch up during the day.
My guru spiritual friend from the 1980.s was a no nonsense Brit and he told me that dreams were "rubbish".
But, I have to wonder why I keep dreaming of the sky full of airplanes, it is almost covering all the blue and the clouds. I am watching with people and I tell them all to hide in ditches.
Often it follows with parachutes and strange looking people coming to great us, some nights they are friendly, some night they want to kill us.
I am always frightened and shivering and wake up being terrified.
This has been going on for several months now.
Of course I have lived this several times as a child, the planes did come very low to hit the electrical plant and I was trained to run in a ditch when outdoors.
Could this come back up after all these years?
It is mixed with another dream , I have had that one for years now.
I am packing, often stuff we carried in the shop (did we not pack every week end for the shows?) then I have to get on a plane, a car, a van, a train, and I always miss it. No money, lost my tickets, Bob is sick, have too much stuff (that's for sure) I just cant get home and I am crushed and do not know how to solve it all.
Perhaps the mess left in Bob's hoarding studio is coming alive in my dream.
I dont know but I am sure not happy about these 2 in particular.
Almost always Bob is ill with Alzheimer.
It can't leave me even in my sleep.
C.B.said Rubbish Rubbish
is he right?
Monday, June 28, 2010
World Cup 2010
Of course we now know that some ref's are blind or heaven for bid prejudiced.
The goal for the Brits was there for all to see except for the side liner and the ref.
Come on!!!!These guys have so much power. In hockey the men upstairs sit and judge the videos sometimes for 10 minutes before they give it a call.
No one has to check the soccer ref's.
Their word is gold.
Of course the Brits would have lost anyway, the Germans are young and full of fight to get what they want.
Enough said.
OK so I have some prejudices.
England did not play up to par but I think the USA is getting better and better. It is time that we consider this a great sport. Teach the young ones and they do in my Peter school. Amen to that!!! I for myself see little skills in the huge padded men who try and face each other in combat over a ball.
If you are 290 lbs you may be able to push someone around very quickly,
if you are a giant you may be able to put any ball in a basket.
I do not know much about the last named games but I see logic in my argument. Love soccer.
Love hockey because as son said it takes enormous skills to be able to play it well.
The goal for the Brits was there for all to see except for the side liner and the ref.
Come on!!!!These guys have so much power. In hockey the men upstairs sit and judge the videos sometimes for 10 minutes before they give it a call.
No one has to check the soccer ref's.
Their word is gold.
Of course the Brits would have lost anyway, the Germans are young and full of fight to get what they want.
Enough said.
OK so I have some prejudices.
England did not play up to par but I think the USA is getting better and better. It is time that we consider this a great sport. Teach the young ones and they do in my Peter school. Amen to that!!! I for myself see little skills in the huge padded men who try and face each other in combat over a ball.
If you are 290 lbs you may be able to push someone around very quickly,
if you are a giant you may be able to put any ball in a basket.
I do not know much about the last named games but I see logic in my argument. Love soccer.
Love hockey because as son said it takes enormous skills to be able to play it well.
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