debt forgiven????

The N C state has a program to help deaf people.
It works well, I think, they came to me within a day after I called them.
They gave me 1 hearing aid.
It did not help all that much but in the quiet of the house I can hear the water running if I used them.
My hearing loss is at 80 percent right now= severe in their lingo.
So when Bijou went on the destruction path I sent an email to the State
BECAUSE these are "loaners" (who would want my old hearing aid?)
and I signed my life away when I got this pair.
I am supposed to pay back and can't get a new one until 4 years from now.
Looks like they may forgive me my debt, at least that is what was written to me.
I am never sure when it comes to government agencies but I hope this is so.

I resurrected my last cheap one which I bought on line, it only has one setting: LOUD which does not work in restaurants or public loud places.
I will go and see what other options I have since I started this journey into "faux ears".

Problem with this is that I can't travel alone. Go to dr.s with Brie as they all tend to whisper no matter how often I say "I can't hear you". Can't enjoy a table of 4 because the echoes ring loud and clear but the words are mumbled.
I often order a glass of wine and listen to my own thoughts.
A deaf person becomes a lonely person. If I had been smart I would have learned to sign and I can still do that but then I will have to find others who sign.
It all is not worth it anymore. Stay with the computer and "talk" to my friends over the invisible wires.
So sorry to bitch!!!!