Tuesday, March 4, 2008


I have read many books about Alzheimer. People who had lived with it and try and help.
The disease works so differently for every person , so you have to pick out of the
writings what could work for you to make it through the days.

Recommended books: Elder Rage by Jacqueline Marcell
The 36 Hour Day, Mace and Rabins

Most of all I read that friendships go by the way side. Invitations for dinners are slowly going away. (Even Cindy Adams wrote about that) You see less and less of the people of your "old circle". If I remember it right Cindy wrote that Milton Berle still took her husband to lunch'
even if he dribbled on his $500 tie, Milton would help him out. However Milton was one of the few who stood by his friend in that manner.

As a couple you no longer "fit in" even if the afflicted still has good table manners.
He or she may still be able to have a conversation at some level.
In our case I stopped all activities in our house because B. is certain that the visitors came
to steal from him. Even our kids are here to get something when nothing could be further from their minds.
I stopped taking him with me to our best friends luncheons because I frankly enjoy to
be able to talk "grown up" talk to someone across the table.

Having said all that , I can't say that anyone has left us behind.
Bob's friends from 60 years ago still write, email or call.
He does not know them anymore but he is lucky to have known them and
their interest in his well being. Thanks to Terry,Allen,Acey.
Our mutual friends are here for me anytime I would need them and they have
not deserted us at all. Thanks to Celia,Louis,Lee,Rand,Fishers, and no doubt I am forgetting
So my situation does not fit what they write about, thank God.
I still have friends, Bob still has friends and what a blessing this is.
I wish the same for every reader who comes along and reads this blog.

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