Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Katia? then Lee?

EYES ON THE ATLANTIC: Tropical Storm Katia is in the Central Atlantic, and it could be upgraded to a hurricane later today.

But under that I noticed they are also talking about one named LEE, how about them apples Mrs. Kush?

Stay dry for a change

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Brie still sickly and the Hudson river in 1954

She said she could not even find the cough syrup Robitussin (sp) it was all sold out.
I guess there is something good about being isolated in your house , you do not see people but you do not see sick people either. Ha!

Ran out of dog food and waiting for my ride in the meantime i am checking the freezer and making them salmon with rice. It is good to be a dog in my house, believe me.

I am back to calm but I have no appetite, what is up with that??
No wonder my kicking in I forgot to eat lunch.
I also slept 3 hours this afternoon.
I should be a beauty by now if I am getting all this beauty sleep.
I think it is a "wrinkle" sleep.

I was thinking a lot about the Hudson river last week as Irene embraced the area.
I went back to 1954 ,living in Montreal waiting for a visa and my sponsors to arrive stateside. My then husband and I purchased a 1949 or 47 I am not sure Studebaker, green, it was a dud, of course we knew nothing about cars, none of our peers back home had cars as yet so we were very proud of that clunker.
The Schachts (our sponsors) arrived in Camp Kilmer New Jersey after their last tour of duty in Germany. With them came my dishes, my clock, my most beloved Spooky.
I had to give up Spooky for my dream to come to the US.
Spooky was a wirehaired terrier and loved me and vice versa. He was my baby.
The Schachts came to gethim in Ghent before we departed and I can still see him on
the back of the seat just looking at me "What have you done?" he said.
I crumbled for weeks thereafter.
So now we have a chance to go visit while still waiting for our immigration visa.
We managed to get a visitors visa and get into the car , no insurance, no worries but getting to the USA for a visit.
The Studebaker soon told us it liked oil. Not gasoline but oil. At every small and big town we filled the oil while we left somewhat of a trail of smoke.
As we crossed the border I did some more crying, I was home and I could not stay.
It was just a short visit. I believe the only super highway finished then was
the NJ Turnpike. We just went from village to village enjoying every white church and steeple as I seen in the Life Magazines I had looked at back home.
America was as beautiful as I had been dreaming.
Then we came to a point that we followed the Hudson, I remember at one curve we were shocked as in front of us were hundreds of left to rust army boats of all sizes.
They looked to me like all "Seapower" size, the boat who came to repair our elctricity in 1945 and parked in front of my door at the Canal of Terneuzen.
We stopped and just stood in wonder of all this hardware which no doubt had seen a lot of war and had been the place where people had died.
It was a somber view hard to wrap your head around it.
The ride in the Catskills had surprised me as their were many hotels and resorts and on some they had signs "Gentiles only" ,I did not understand what this was until Sergeant Schacht explained it to me.
Once we found Camp kilmer it was a closed camp. I think Eisenhower had closed a lot of them. My friends were the skeleton crew to keep order in the barracks and they lived in a huge barrack with room to dance around in it.
Spooky came slowly towards us but did not know us and my heart started to break in pieces....I yelled out : Spooky, Spooky!
He knew that voice and came running at me in full speed jumping in my arms.
We were there 3 days and he never left my legs, in the bathroom, the shower, by the bed , Spooky was there. He broke my heart, we could not have taken him back to Canada, we were not allowed dogs in our apartment and we were hoping to get the permanent visa any day now (took another year).
I left my heart om N J that year and the return to Montreal was anything but fun with the smoking Studebaker.
The Hudson River did not seem that great now and the boats did not even make us stop on the return.
A week or so later a letter came from America.
The Schachts were in shock and in pain too, Spooky had just gone to sleep and died 3 days after we left. He had a broken heart.

Monday, August 29, 2011

Calming Monday

My New Jersey friends are OK. Maggie in Wilmington is OK. Lee in Mass. is OK.
Kids on the boat are OK. Noah is OK , Sabra too, I can relax now.
I only watched half the news tonight and let it rest.

Latest on news is that chocolate including milk chocolate is good for combating heart disease, wonder if Nestle was the sponsor of the search.

The Monday quarter back, is that what they call it? I am not into football.
Well now different opinions are being posted everywhere about how the predictions were handled. Give me a break, it is mother nature and she is fickle. We are doing better at this year after year but still are we supposed to say:
"You know people it may be very bad or nothing at all, go play bridge, run around naked if you will, all is cool. We just do not know much, bye bye".

In view of Katrina's past I do think that we need to be vigilant and the politicians have a lot at stake here. We need to know what to do next and if suddenly the sun appears then get a sun tan!

Irene out of here? On way to Canada?

I have not watched the news this morning.
I am on news overload.
I was so antsy and at times started to think I had to move the garden furniture.
I became disoriented at times...not good.

The boat people have decisions to make and if you read Rhonda's answer to Ana then you know that they expect a lot of debris on the Hudson.

Debris and cleaning up water in many townships is the heartache now.
Seeing the lovely New England houses row by row in water breaks my heart.

Getting all these sick people back to N Y will be a project.

Rand sent a photo taken from a high building in NY , you see the street below and five huge trees all down in the middle of the street like dominoes...

Mother would have said it is good for the tree farmers and landscape artists.

Maybe not, maybe there is not going to be enough in the budgets to replant.

I keep looking out at that naked, dead tree a street up from me it will fall this winter, it will just miss my house but will drop on the cop's house if it falls in our direction.
I doubt the lady who owns it has the funds to have it cut down. She is somewhat of a recluse.

Sabrina sounds like Lauren Bacall, she has problems in the windpipes for sure...

A new week and less worries....Imagine that!!! Great!!!!

Sunday, August 28, 2011

The cab driver said it would not be bad but...the mayor said:

Worst Poughkeepsie flooding in recent memory, officials say

POUGHKEEPSIE – The city’s most senior officials say Hurricane Irene caused the worst flooding of Poughkeepsie in recent history.

The Hudson River crested over its banks and flooded Waryas Park, extending past the Ice House. The Mid-Hudson Bridge was barely visible during the height of the storm and its driving rain.

Mayor John Tkazyik said now comes figuring out how to pay for the overtime and repairs to any damaged infrastructure. (Listen to interview with the mayor.)

“We are hopeful that given what the President and the Governor have stated that we are going to be able to keep track of many of these additional costs that we are experiencing and get some financial support and able to cover the overtime, additional manpower and additional resources we are utilizing,” he said.

The Hudson also crested over its banks in the City of Newburgh and flooded out at least one popular waterfront eatery.

Residents experiencing flooding may call 845-451-4000 to report them.

Ana, who?

Ana I read is not due until 2015

Gert may come up next

There was an Ana some time ago too.

boat found in perfect shape

we can relax now.
Is there another one coming our wAY? A hurricane I mean, someone emailed me that but that is a cruel joke, no?

How to spell Poughkeepsie

I am tired of trying different ways to spell that town so I will be glad when they are on board and on the way to places I can spell.
Irene I can spell and never want to see or hear it again.
I have had at with this storm and news man standing in 3 inches of water trying to make it sound worse. A friend wrote me that and I had been thinking it all night, wondering how much disaster they could actually show.
Now when I see house without a roof I feel the pain of the owners and when I hear about 13 dead in N C I am quite devastated.
I am still waiting for N J and Mass friends to tell me that their trees did not come down on their houses, that is a concern.....


67 feet?

amateurs — 43 electronically and nine celestially, including all-female Etoile, three double-handed, 10 short-handed and three family boats. Two Voyagers vie for prizes in different classes — a 40-foot yacht skippered by Clifford Kurz and a 67-footer skippered by Geraldo Rivera.

Sabrina is sick no groceries tomorrow, no lunch, no giggling

I hope she can get well in a hurry , she has a long week end off coming this week and she should not be in bed for that, poor kid, exhausted.
Having major problems with internet disconnecting for a few weeks now and its a mess.
Brie thinks it is only allergies, summer colds can be such a bummer.
Wish her well and speedy recovery.

News from Gypsy is that the storm is beginning to hit them and high rising river is on the way. Horizontal rain, she wrote.
Lets hope all goes well with the boat.

I better go and do some baking as we are out of buns for breakfast.
I have been sleeping most of the morning.
Mild worrying makes me sleepy.

woke up as light came between the drapery cracks

turned on tv
it was 6 something lay down on the bed and fell asleep again
wokeup after 9 and walked Bijou.
There is a gentle breeze outside not enough to keep it cool
I am sweating walking.
I read all the emails and Gypsy blog
going back to the bedroom to watch TV
E and Gaston have kids in the USA
one couple with kids are in Manhattan locked up in their hotel
he belongs to games put on by firemen over the world.
the other couple are in L A far away from this mess.
Hoping for the best but it is not over yet for NY

Saturday, August 27, 2011

maryland is getting wet feet

and Rhode Island coastal people are now getting orders for evacuation.
I forget how many in NC are already without power, in the thousands.
DC Mayor is still keeping the underground working, they have sandbags in front of entries but I saw like 2 rows of them, that is not going to hold much water.
NY City hospital has 6 patients too ill to travel, one has a brain tumor and sister was beside herself. If the water goes into the basement that is where they are housing their generators!!!!All other hospitals belonging to city (5) and nursing homes are evacuated. I think Bloomberg is trying not to see a New Orleans when Monday rolls around. Obama has been visiting centers and how the preparations are going.
NJ is being slammered with heavy rains. Maryland is now the Main problem at this hour.
Irene is as big in size as Europe, hard to imagine, she is very wide and round.

NY will see it all tomorrow morning.

The boat people in Poughkeepsie are heading out to hotel.
A large sailboat belonging to a celebrity is near them, the captain is staying on board and will keep them up to date via phone. If the phones keep working.

The water is already higher at Battery Park said the man , just inches right now but the rest will be tomorrow morning.

Had a lovely lunch with L and C

Went to Sinbad and it was delicious.
Could not wait till we got home and I saw what Rhonda had blogged.
Looks like it is going as good as it can.
Anxious for tomorrow.
My puter has problems, that is the server hope we can have it
fixed on Monday.
I am exhausted.
I gave a chair to Jaime from the bedroom I need more space
I need more throwing away junk time.
I am going to take a nap and check CNN

what we learn in emergencies

The gas stations run out of gas.

The ATM machines run out of cash and of course the storm is on a week end.

sand bags are at a premium and so is boarding up material

so now I am wondering where does the sand come from?
Depleting our shores?
Just wondering.

Last I heard NY is still on the target

Mariners 2 :

just saw on CNN that NY hospitals continue evacuation and bringing people to hospitals in Poughkeepsie ...saturday 10 08 am

here sunny and calm

Mariners :

Just read your new blog.
I think it best you do not see the hype on TV, it is getting me in a tizzy.
But I watched Katrina too, I am just trying to see what we can learn from all this.
The way we built..surely...the way we prepare...
no use buying a bunch of groceries when you know you will be without power for awhile.
I made a funny on Facebook
Sabra: now where did I put my arc plans?
Jeannot: I think your brother Noah has them

I am so witty. Noah of course is still in NY , the last I heard.

I have no idea yet where it is all heading.
It will be cat 1 in N Y but they say not to be fooled by this.
All transport at a still at noon today,
that will be eerie, New Yorkers do not use cars that much,
they take the subway and the busses.
All will be stopped.
I am sure we will see photos of what it looks like.

Washington too is in state of emergency.

the best one can do when all is said and done is to find shelter and pray if you can.

Bubbles around you!!!!

My mother said:

That in every calamity or disaster someone will benefit....
How so? I thought.
She was right.
Very simple example:
I fall down the steps in the snow.
I break my ankle in 3 places.
I give work to :
2 ambulance drivers
staff of many at the ER
surgeon, his helper, his nurses, the guy who makes me sleep
the room nurses around the clock
the janitor who cleans my room
the people who wash the sheets
the therapist who insists I walk a bit
then the service to get me to rehab (2 guys)
rehab: around the clock nurses
nurses aids
cleaning ladies
cooks for my meal
therapists by the dozen
visits to the dr more special drivers
then home and a visiting nurse every other day
therapist too.

6 months later I am without pain and can walk.
I gave a lot of people a lot of work.
Somebody benefits.

During the war my mother said:
Every body benefits from misfortune except in the war.
We die, get shot, bombarded etc...the only ones to
benefits are the undertakers and the casket maker.
The men who dig holes to put you in.
Well, she said with a laugh, I never met an undertaker who is not jolly.
He can count on work no matter the world economy or politics. People will die.

Just reflecting on what mother said.

trends and who cares about what

something i do not understand.
The Yahoo trend today is numero uno Will and his wife.....
will they or are they going to split.....
BIG news item and searched and over searched.

Number 10 on the list :the hurricane Irene.
Irene may cost lives and a great deal of damage
that is the last on the list of searches..............

I just do not understand anymore......

Friday, August 26, 2011

calling our sailors , Friday eve 11 16

OK I followed the New Orleans disaster minute by minute
I am doing this with Irene too.
This time with a lump in the throat.
I have kids in this storm.

Last I heard about 20 minutes ago is that in land will have A LOT OF flooding too,
Lee worried about her trees, they have had rain for days and everything is soaked
another 5 to 8 inches of rain added and the trees may fall.

I could not sleep, I kept thinking the crew was going to Baltimore to get their cars to safety as they expected floods there too.
What are they thinking I said to myself. The N J Turnpike is already closed, all transportation in NYC stops tomorrow at noon. Never been done before.
Hospitals are empty along the low line Manhattan.
Evacuation was with ambulances, helicopters, busses. Unbelievable to watch.
Even babies in incumbators, no one died in transit so they say.

Army has been called and is in NY to help after the fact. Reserve

At this moment I wonder how high the Hudson will be rising???
Does anyone know???
75 Mile winds can do a lot of damage.
Hope the boat is insured.
But first think of your safety.

No gasoline along roads, I saw some fighting for the last tank.
In a situation like this you see 2 different kinds of people.
You see the sharing ones who will take care of strangers, feed them and
give them shelter and then there are the ones who panic and feel that
they should have the privilege of survival over any body else.

I am glad I got up and saw the new emails and now know you will be safe in a hotel and stay away from windows.

So glad the keys will be in Baltimore and pray tell if they expect floods where are the cars going to be safe from that?

Noah tells his mother that he will come out there on sUNDAY, she thinks he is nuts, she knows hurricanes, these New Yorkers are not buying the danger. Time and time again young people interviewed say "Nah, nothing like that will happen"
Hope they are right.
Now I will go to sleep. it is 11 32 almost Saturday and the eye should hit NC in 8 hours.

Poughkeepsie calling

Rhonda if you read this there are cars on the road with evacuation , in the millions, forgot the numbers, get a hotel asap before they are full.
You should see the highways.


Get out of low lands!
Traffic from Jersey shores is piled up everywhere.
Take on a hotel or pay in advance because everyone is going for higher grounds.
That is directed at my boat people.
Go as far as you can away from the sea.

Irene starting to make the NC coast a bit wet

Maggie from Wilmington is going for higher grounds but no evacuation was asked for, the governor did tell the people on the coast to just go and mandatory evacuation is in force on the island and the immediate coastal housing and hotels.

I watch it all with care, and I hear that New Yorkers do not listen to anyone, least of all officials. That may be a problem for them on Sunday.
If Irene keeps going the way she has then Manhattan could be flooded according to predictions. This storm is the worst in 50 years.

The water rats stayed in Tarytown last night but are en route to poughkeepsie which is 60 miles from Manhattan, hope that helps, wonder if the Hudson would not crest too?They have reservations at a hotel for the week end. Of course the boat is an issue of great concern I am sure.

We in the mountains will not get a drop of water from it all and we continue to be in heat if you pardon the pun. We do need more water.

My friend Lee is in Mass and no doubt will have some wind issues so I am concerned about her in that marvelous part of the country with so many older houses, churches and buildings.

On to later with update Irene.
Lets not even think about the next one which is brewing in the oceans somewhere.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Sailors en route on the Hudson River

I have watched the reports on Rhonda's blog and they are probably still sailing till they will hit Tarrytown and stop there for awhile (?)
Guess adventures have different plans at times.
Irene is messing with them and millions of others.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

blue butterfly in the garden

Finally a nlue and black butterfly came into my garden today, he did not sit on my shoulder like last year but he did fly around me a few times so that I would notice him.

so where ARE the gypsies in the boat?

Last I heard they did not know what they were going to do with Irene.
Now the latest on this Wednesday is that Irene may even be in NY on Sunday
and on to Boston, so going North was not an option and if they returned sOUTH they are bound to run in foul weather too.
No news on the blog today.
I hope they found a place to hide the boat and go inland ans wait it out.

Nancy Reagan tripped today on a part of pillar to hold back a rope,
she just hit with her foot a little bit and started to fall.
Then they gave us the amount of people over 65 who fall and hurt themselves.
I am not alone.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

shopping day

Nice lunch, I hope, and a bit of grocery shopping.
Weather is nice, sunny blue sky not a cloud to be seen.
Being Miss I have to worry about something...I got up middle
of the night to check if I had paid my house insurance...
of course I did.
Where did I get such a notion??...storm coming...a dead tree in the other street
that will in no way reach me but the guy across the street....possible floods in the sub basement...I see where my demolition thoughts are so damn positive.
Cheer up girl, a lot of states need the water, the sailpeople are on the alert,
life is good at home...why invent worries???
I was born that way.
Now smile...take a shower and go shopping!!!!!

Monday, August 22, 2011

Good night Irene, Good night

Just stay away from our coast. We have had enough "natural" calamities to last us.
Now we also have kin on the water to worry about.
Land fall by week end?Maybe?


Yesterday some women in Asheville were protesting ....what do they want now?
Well, it is simple. Since men walk around with their torso bare the other gender wants the same privilege. Come one, be serious just wanted to show off that you have pretty breast and you could not care enough about yourself so you wanted to share this with the world.
Nothing to do with equality. Get a grip, girls.
Go to work and fight for the rights to be paid the same as the man who is doing the same job as you.
There are so many ways to ask and work towards equality showing your boobs is not the answer.
Let's just suppose that this would become a law, would you walk around topless in
20 years? Or after you nursed a few kids? Get a life.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Bijou is a thief

He managed to talk the big dog to get the pot roast piece on the counter, when it fell he took it away from the big dog and ran to his caqe and growled at me for wanting to take it away. He probably will have heart burn all night....serves him right!

My bf in Belgium celebrated their 60th anniversary yesterday, there it means reception in city hall!!!!Then they had a special dinner out and it was a great feast. Her husband lived across the street from me when I was born, I think he us about 4 years older than I. She went to my school and I knew her forever , we3 lost touch for a long while. My mother did not like me to run around with other people when I visited. She always paid for my trip and she wanted me to herself.
After she passed on I revisited Elza more often and now her husband and I email
every day. Congratulations you two!!!!!!60 years is what it would have been if I had not divorced numero uno, I take it back I would not have stayed alive so long.
I probably would have killed him and be in jail or death.
I too had married a few months before E and G.

E. stayed in her mom's house all these years, I was a gypsy and went all over the place, Canada, East Coast, West Coast back to Europe then to the South.

I have looked for blue butterflies to come around. Last year I could not get rid of one, he would come and sit on my shoulder for the longest time and fly around my head, the last tattered one we saw was when we put Bob's ashes in the river in the forest. All I get now is white moths.

Who has been messing with my scale. This morning I got on and saw immediately that I was reading kilos. Now that is not upsetting to me, I was born in kilo land and grew up in meters. Yesterday it was set on lbs!!!!

Got to go and prepare for night night with fat belly Bijou.

The energy wagon is going by too fast

I can't seem to get on it and I am lazy and tired.
This whole week has been nuts like that.

Friday, August 19, 2011


My English is self taught and for the life of me I never know how to spell the word :"neighbor" I always put another g in there somewhere. 50 plus years and I am still not getting it.

What I am also not getting is the change in our culture ,speaking of neighborhoods.

Rhonda wrote in her blog that the people they meet, while they are living on a boat,
are so friendly. A boat will dock next to them and immediately there is contact.
People are so friendly, she writes.

So I go back in though to 1955 when I moved here and lived in New Jersey for awhile.
I knew every one in the street. We did get a cup of sugar from Mabel across the street, found numerous babysitters all around us. Lady next door had a major drinking problem with 5 kids. The oldest came to me every day telling me Mom had the flu and how would she cook this or that. The 16 year old ran the household.
I helped when I could. My babies were born there, day in and day out I had the
pram outside the front door ,babies stuffed in blankets and as a good Belgian girl I knew they needed fresh air every day. No one ever touched these little ones.

Moving to California we first bought a house in Campbell and again we met everyone
and had chit chats over the fence, watched each other kids and sat at the table with a cup of coffee while we discovered where to shop and what to bring to the new community in this new neighborhood.
Then all hell broke lose when husband nr uno was arrested in the food store he managed. He had given discounts to "ladies" when he checked them out so he went to jail overnight and then got headlines in the paper.
No one talked to me anymore and we moved into the mountains hiding my head in shame. Husband thought he was robin Hood and gave to the poor...yeah right.

In the mountains we found a neat old house we could afford, having lost the new house we just purchased months before. The town was then very, very small.
Soon we knew everyone and again the camaraderie was there and the welcome.
I felt very safe there. No one knew about the San Jose newspaper article.

Fast forward to 1969, a new marriage and the event of hippies in the gorgeous quiet valley that I adored. Strange happenings with drug scenario, people moved next door and had sex orgies with very young girls and no curtains, calling the cops was no help it took me 35 minutes to get to us.
We fled for 5 years to Spain.

Moving to where we still are in 1976 in NC. People around us where older than us and extremely friendly. Over the next 35 years the old left us for better places (we hope) and new younger and younger people arrived. At this point I do not know the names of the people across the street. The retired policeman on the other side waves. No one goes from house to house to borrow sugar or have a cup of coffee.
People are rushing out at 7 or 8 AM return in the evening.
The neighborhood is quiet. Where is the cameraderie? Are we so busy working?
Are we just "into our family? Or just into internet such as I do?

Thursday, August 18, 2011

interesting show about psychics last night

Of course the famous Randy was there offering one million bucks if someone could prove to him that they had indeed psychic powers and in touch with the unknown.
No one even came close. Sylvia Browne refused his tests time and time again.
BTW SYLVIA Browne on Montel had told a family that the missing son was gone and showed an area where he might be. Family mourned for years and then the boy showed up last year very much alive, had been abducted. It was all on the news, Sylvia
apologized to the family.
James Van Praag was interesting, did not convince the journalist neither did he convince me and I am an easy target.
At the end two L A psychics got to another reporter was that nasty lady who had been on the wives of Beverly Hills .....
Late in life , I am having great doubts about a lot of it.
What I do not like is the money angle. I think if you have such a gift and you can help people you should not charge a penny.
Van charges 125.00 a person in a very large group in a hotel and he gives them tid bits, he is a fabulous cold reader and people do not realize in the moment how much information they are handing him on a platter.
I tried to count the heads in the room at least a hundred there easy money for an hour of work. He lives by the sea in a nice place..........
the two in LA had nice pools and homes..........
a gift like this should be shared...........I had a lot of premonitions in my life
many who became reality ....I read cards....but I would never charge a dime.
Someone brought me a bouquet of roses at one time. I took them but did not expect that.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

the reality shows and are they going too far??????????

I doubt they will stop any time soon, the dollars are pouring in on Bravo, the more fight in New Jersey the more viewers, they always have to have a bad guy or girl.
One of the husbands on the wives of Beverly hills committed suicide this week.
He was often in the picture and had a sour puss ,turns out he is broke and could not keep up with the show motto of wealthy women. Besides that his wife had accused him of hitting her in People magazine...more readers.....more drama.

Show me the money...that is the story of interest....

Loyola University did a study

it seems that 2 glasses of wine a day for men and one glass for women will reduce people from dementia/Alzheimer by 23 %, guess my friend in Mass. will be bright forever and I will have to start a new hobby. Zinfedel (sp?) here I come. (Maybe)

walked Bijou tonight by the cemetary and I thought

the sun was on fire. It was gorgeous, wished I had my camera with me.
Just a fabulous night. If the clouds go away we may see some more of that harvest moon too.

the good and the bad about the Internet

I can't be without my computer.
I get out once a week and otherwise see very few people.
So I play, write, email, buy and sell on the internet.
It is part of my day, the most part of my day.

When I started to sell on eBay it was 1977.
That was some time ago and I can't believe how fast it all went.
Ebay I think was 2 years old then and an infancy full of problems
and joys. Now it is totally an enormous business to deal with not to mention Pay pal too. The policy now protects the buyer a lot more than the seller.
It is also expensive.

I can write to my pals in Belgium and get an immediate reply if they are "on" no more waiting for 5 days till the mail gets in.

Overall it is a marvelous tool for me BUT...I started to blog 4 or so years ago
husband was very sick with Alzheimer and I was a caregiver going out of her mind with worries. Writing about it helped and I had hoped that it would help other people in the same situation. It did for some and got me a job for a year with a site now gone and broke. So somewhere I hope it all did some good.
Sept 5th will be the first anniversary of my husband's passing.
I thought of stopping the blog but a couple of friends asked me to continue and write about my life, my youth, and just about anything.
The request was flattering and I may give it some thought after Sept 5.
However I was very naive when I started this all.
I was a Pollyanna thinking that life was just nothing but lillies and daisies.
What I do regret is that I also discovered that there are mean spirited people who may use your blog for their own gain. Perhaps they are mentally ill and can't help themselves but they are on the internet just like anybody else.
So I made one decision and that is not to write anymore about my son. His life is different from mine and he lives the way he wants to and should be free of freaks and crazies. No research will be possible on this site about Bob. Basta!!!!

August 17th

On AUgust 17th 1955 I came into this country quite legally having waited 4 years for an immigrant visa, together with a family who was willing to take us in and sign for us.
Times have changed, the family would have been responsible for us if we did not start working ........why did we stop that law????
It makes sense.
Also entry was not so easy if you wait 4 years for it and you could not have TB not communistic activities.
Came in on a Greyhound bus from Montreal to New York, no a/c then, hot hot hot bodies and different odors everywhere but all I could think off was "New York".
I remember having a pink peasant blouse on and pink skirt.
Started my period during the trip, oh joy!
Near Connecticut we ran into a huge storm .they did not number them then but this
was frightening. The bus had to stop several times as the driver could not see where he was going. The storm had a name but I long forgot it. Could have been Diane.
The bus drove from small town to small town, no major highways then along that road.The N J Turnpike was fairly new but that is all I remember in major highways.
By the time we hit NY it was nightfall.
My then husband decided to go and hunt for a hotel and found around the corner,
he returned to get me and the suitcases and told me to hurry as he had turned on the tub so I could have a bath (knucklehead he turns on the water and leaves?)
The excitement to finally be here was probably raising my BP even then, at 23!

Talking about this to my second husband we realized that we met on Aug 17th in Santa Cruz when I was renting a shop space in a mini mall. He had the space next to me. The rest was 42 years of a great union.

so today, August 17th, the memories are vivid of both events.....
they bring smiles and happy tears .............

56 years in this country! Wow! Was it not yesterday when I was 20???

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Shopping day

It is cooling down, we will reach 80 today and I can feel autumn in my bones.
Nice not to turn on all the fans and being able to breathe.

The new Roomba is a peach, I work her in every room every day and stay on top of
Carwen's shedding, this one is not so temperamental with cords, she seems to be able to dance her way out of entanglements but she is fussy about her brushes. She stops more then the old one and tells me: clean my brushes. There is hardly a pile up on her brushes but she wants them cleaned so I do it. When she is tired she goes to her station and parks herself. I hardly pick up anything with the vacuum when I followed her one day.

Short list for shopping today but we have a haircut planned.

I love the tomatoes I have grown, started them late but have them now to enjoy.
Next year I will do some more.

Zack started school yesterday, he is now a towering junior, he overshadows us all and finding shoes is not easy for him. He does take after his Fisher Grandpa.
Fortunately he does not hunt.

getting ready for my weekly lunch and shopping day. love it!

Monday, August 15, 2011

another friend passes on

we did not see much of each other in the last decades, he lived in Hawaii.
We did enjoy him in another time and in another place namely Spain in the 1970's.
May he rest in peace.

My address book is almost on empty , I am like Georges Burns, check the obituaries if I am not in it I get up and face the day.

The day was morose and not too to get out of this mood.

about the money

Rhonda wrote about the pennies she finds but the day Bob left us I found a dime and I have been finding dimes every since. Guess he is sending me the inflation extra!

Visited Ari's grave yesterday and there were 9 pennies by her stone.
I still miss that girl.
I had planted one of her mother's plants in a pot there and it is
thriving. Of course, her mom is there with her and I am sure she
is tending to do the plant.

We did cancel our beach trip there are too many other things to do around the house and my mood for ocean is gone.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

closing in on the 1 year..........

he is on my mind all the time now.....I am working on emptying his chest of drawers...I find all sorts of treasures, bottle caps, rubber bands, used stamps...the G string I once bought him decades ago...(Ha Ha) cards I wrote him ....rags...a bag full of pens (mostly dry now)....pennies all over the place...

on Sept 5 it will be one year since he left us....

I ran away two days before that..I left daughter Rhonda in charge to be with him and she took this to mean "do not leave him" , she stayed with him day and night.
For this I am indebted to her.
I was at the end of my rope, I had watched every change day in and day out.
Thirteen years, I had watched ...first he still knew how to drive well and we did our usual day trips ....I started to tell him when to change lanes..when the light was red and he needed to stop. Then the decision to take the license away..he never forgave me for that one.
I watched how much he loved his coffee till one day he looked at me puzzled and said he would never drink that stuff...when I said he drank it every day of his life he looked at me and said :"I never would drink that".
Lucky for me he kissed me till the end. But then at that time I think he was kissing every one.
He dressed himself quite well for a long time then like a switch had turned off he put his pants on backwards and could hardly walk but did not notice the reason for that .....when I wanted to change it, he turned grumpy and said not to touch him.
I saw when he would smile as I crawled in bed and cuddled next to him and then I saw that the eyes grew angry and he told me"Get out of my bed, no strange women come in my bed". I slept on the couch bathing in tears.
He stopped walking the dog, he often would kick the dog as he was not happy with movements around him.
If a workman had to come in he would yell and tell him to get out.
His house and garden were his territory and he felt no one but him should be there.
He started to hide things....hid my hearing aids for which I was still paying, we never found them, hid my new Roomba (a Christmas present from Bobby) but he hid it under leaves and it got soaking wet. $400 down the shute, "they" fixed it but it never worked well again.
One day he said :Oh it is gone and laughed very hard...I said what is gone?
He pointed to his pinky, he had worn my insignia ring from my teen age years on his pinky since we met. The ring was gone. He managed to show me that he had flushed it in the toilet. I am sure it was by accident as he was losing weight.
I managed to buy him a sterling wedding band and switched his gold one and hid it
ditto with his father's ring. I did not want them to go down the sewer too.

I can and may still write a book about it all but today I am beginning to feel that the 5th is near. Review the year and go forward knowing that I did all I could for him while alive. I love him so much. If there are soul mates then he was it.
I am no longer sure about that title. I know he was the one who gave me life.
A very good life full of love. I was 36 when I met him and that was the day I was born. What happened before was not that pleasant.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Ok Dr bones has an opinion...I do not have to agree

said he, yes the handsome one, I did not like his shirt tie combination today ....
so said he:"your back is ugly....IF you fall again you will go through the same scenario....your bones are brittle...take vitamin D (I already do)".
I decided that I am going to walk on eggs until I am steady without vertigo and
just let him talk and do my thing.
He told another lady I know after he did her shoulder surgery:
"this will probably come back so be prepared!"
I think he is wishing for more clients so he plants this stuff into our
He also told me a few months ago that his friend had the same surgery as mine
and they said he did not have any cancer anymore and he died from cancer 6 months later. He looked at my necklace then and said: Will this to Sabrina!
The end of this month it will be 5 months since my surgery...yikes....

I am going to the beach for the Labor day week end with Brie.
We both can use a "run away" time even for a few days.
The ocean loves me and the sun there is stronger then here (S C )
so I should get some help with the scalp which is now one landmark of psoriasis,
I do not flake little tiny flakes I have snowflakes falling from my

Bob is doing very well in the humor department.
He is triply kind to me, he is a nice guy.
He will conquer this disease, he has to.
He still has a lot of life in him.
Girlfriend is still upper most on his mind.
Good so!

Sabrina went sliding or whatever they call it,
just going down a rope at 55 miles an hour and 200 feet above the trees.
She loved it.

Got to do some dishes

Monday, August 8, 2011

Sunday, August 7, 2011

so our credit rating is down the toilet.

It will be interesting to see what the next weeks will bring.
was watching Amanpour and no one at the table was very happy about the way
this was done. Politics, who can understand the undergarments of politics,
the deals made in quiet rooms, promises to the industry, promises to countries, wars, costly deals.

Our loss today in the human scene is greater with more soldiers dying.
22 of our elite men , blown up in a helicopter. Belonging to a very small
group of 300 or so. Thinking of all the families at home today, children who
will never see their father again. This is now almost a daily routine...cost? enormous, cost of lives? not replaceable.

If I start thinking about it all I will go in a corner and sulk, what can I do to change anything? I can help with world hunger and hope the people who need it
will get their share of it.

Forget my mood, I am grouchy and I no longer have PMS to blame it on.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

lovely week end

Had a nice visit with Bob's girlfriend.
What I learned so far is that she is very considerate and remembers things about you, she brought me this large glass which holds a zillion tons of water, it is double walled so it keeps it cool, in the wall is a blue butterfly.
She remembered the butterfly story and she knows I need to drink water, she gave it to me with orders to DRINK THE WATER.
Same with her Mom who made raspberry cheesecake for him as his favorite fruit is
raspberries. They seem to remember the little things.

On the other side of the coin, a stalked who made his life miserable for 2 years,
he never met, never talked on the phone, is back on the email trail to make his life miserable. A sicko person who needs mental help. When are we going to help people who need that kind of a hand????

I probably gained 5 lbs with the cheesecake, calories were left in it.

I did enjoy some very cool moments today with a bit of rain and started to be able to clean the house. I did, honestly I did.

Rhonda is at sea on the way to Maine.
It is her dream.

I am feeling very healthy so hope all the other tests will be fine too.
They have to be.
I have much to see and do.

the brutal honesty .......

people who know me, know that I tell it like it is.
No bandages, no pretending, I am who I am, would I like to improve? yup, I surely would and I strive for it all the time, it does not always work.

The girl in Bob's life is a plus.
I said it before, he now laughs a lot and tries to walk a bit further away from the house, it is a good start.

I run ,again, 2 businesses, eBay and my shop in Brevard, it remains to be seen if I will make money. I also sell a great deal of my "collections" time to try simplicity.

Simplicity! It has never worked before, we always were working out of this house.
At first Bob and I made our Santas on the kitchen table, rabbit fur was everywhere, creeping into the nostrils even and in parts we did not know we had.
We had so much fun but the house was such a shambles. Fabrics here and there and a sewing machine here and there. We worked hard until we rented a studio above our shop and that became our haven for fur and fabrics.

We did shows for years and years, high end craft shows, the Father Christmas dolls sold for 175.00 and we never made the same one twice.
We did art shows all over the Eastern seaboard with Bob's work.
We did antique shows in Atlanta, Charlotte, Mount Dora when it was antique heaven and on and on.....
The unloading of stuff often in the house and starting all over again next Friday.
We were not allowed to make this a commercial site but we should have.
Bob took in restorations and paintings with holes were to be found in every corner waiting for the master.

I can work in chaos. I am not orderly, never have been, and that is what I want to change...and then I buy hundreds of different beads ,chains, threads tools all for the necklaces I make. It is another puzzle ....I am trying to sort them all out as they come in and then when I start making a necklace I mess them up trying to find THE bead I want. Excuses , excuses, to try and tell myself that I am OK..I can't be like Sabrina who used to empty the ashtray of her husband as soon as he had a bud in it. She is a bit better now, at home we call that the cleaning sickness.
Here it is OCD, I think.

So....I sat down this lovely lady who is new in our lives and said:
It was very hot this week, I did not do anything to prepare for company..the floor needs washing and I have beads on the table which I need to prepare for their dear girl, you have to learn to take me warts and all, I will no longer scramble to get everything in order before you come into the door.
You have to take me as I am....

She was polite and smiled.....wonder what she thought....does it matter to me?
Yes, it matters a lot what people think about me and how dumb is that?
I have lived a long life with ups and downs as we all have and I am the product of it all.......

Now I better go and clear my desk.............or not

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Doctor review

The CT scan needed from my solo kidney was not what I had hoped for,blood test showed it was not working full force.
So then the people who know about these things decided not to do the dye test and make the the kidney work harder.

I was a bit wondering what would be call a few minutes ago from urologist: everything looks good, not unusual for the kidney to be a bit slow
taking on the work of the other one too.
Not to worry....

So not worrying I will do, I feel fine.
Some days I know I am bloated but I must learn to drink more water instead of junk.....

Lunch at Bistro was not as good as usual, waiter's head in the cloud, service not so hot....the flower shop I did not visit this time...not in my budget..we are missing the discount we got with Rhonda working it is a bit expensive for my taste and I am finished planting anyway.

Zack and friend came yesterday to finish the back yard.
He managed to get the formidable wood growing weed up the phone pole, it was a problem and not quite on my property. Do not think that Miss Ross knows that.

Sabrina forgot her phone yesterday and it was like she had lost her best friend...we joked about it all day...she finally started using her glasses case and talking to it....

The heat is making me sick and nautious....enough already.....I think SC is in the three digits.

The government paid our social security today, thank you for small favors....
some body said it was a gift we receive....a gift? much do you pay each time you get a paycheck????

Hate to think about the voting next will be a circus....Prez you got my vote, I knew 3 years ago you could not clean up this mess in one term, probably not in 2 terms either....

Got to go and walk a hot dog in the hot sun.....

Monday, August 1, 2011

the house of smiles

something is happening in our house....the tears are dryed up most of the time....the pain is almost all gone....both physical and emotional....the garden is starting to look finances are better...but most of all love has entered these walls.
These walls have been too moisterized with my tears for a decade or more.
The walls are hearing more and more laughter....son is happy...that is an elusive word that I no longer son is content and I am content.
Son is finding new love. It may be forever, it may be for a short time, who knows but love is giving him a lot of hope, he is going to try to get healed by his own will
if possible.
You can tell he is better because he jokes with me and he puts his arms around me more often. We both need "the touch". Another human being just hugging you and
meaning it. He did not do that for a long time, he was lost in his own
sadness and he does not b s people.
What Bob what he gives you is what he is capable of and means it, good or bad.
I see him in front of the screen doing the sKYPE visit in the evening and he is
all smiles. He is a good man.
I have hope for him and I am all for it, the healing, the new life, another grandson (age 5) ...all is well in my world....